City Lights
by Seattle Baby
Summary: After having troubles with Derek, Meredith leaves to Seattle to start a new life where she meets some interesting characters.
1. City Lights, 1

**Ok, I decided to make this fic because I thought of it, and I thought it may have a chance in the real world of fanficcing! Teehee, I hope it does!!! Please, tell me what you think**

_The day's last one-way ticket train pulls in  
We smile for the casual closure capturing  
There goes the downpour  
Here goes my fare thee well_

The winter wind blew, even inside of the train station. It sent shudders up a young couples spine as they stood in the middle crowded train station. She looked pleadingly into his eyes, never taking her eyes off of him. He, on the other hand had a place and a certain "friend" that he would rather be with, but he promised her that he would take her to the station, for goodbye's sake. He looked around, his patience being tested as these inconsiderate people continually shoved, poked and prodded them in the bustling crowd. Pushing his damp curley hair out of his face, he wanted to scream at the top of his lungs.

_There's really no way to reach me  
There's really no way to reach me  
There's really no way to reach me  
'Cause I'm already gone _

She, on the other hand, couldn't register anyone else in the room. She knew this day would come, she wasn't sure when, but she knew it would. He slowly turned his attention back to her, noticing the tears welling in her eyes. He smiled lightly, placing his hand on her cold, soft cheek, wiping a stray tear from her cheek. She smiled back, trying to give some closure on their relationship. She was just getting lost again into his dreamy smile, when an annoncement came on, breaking their stare as he looked up to a speaker, trying to understand what he was saying. It was a final call for boarding from staction 3.

_Only so many words that we can say  
Spoken upon long-distance melody  
This is my hello  
This is my goodness _

"Thats you," he spoke softly into her ear. She closed her eyes, his hand still rested on her cheek. She leaded into it, wishing that somehow, someway, it was just a dream. A beautiful dream that had gone horribly wrong - a nightmare in a sense. She grabbed onto his wrists, almost refusing to let him go, "Meredith," he said, putting his other hand on her other cheek, cupping her face. Meredith knew that he didn't want to be here, but she needed him there. It was time for her to let him go. She loved him, thats what people do when their in love, right? Let them go? If thats what they want at least. . .

_There's really no way to reach me  
There's really no way to reach me  
There's really no way to reach me  
'Cause I'm already gone _

She looked back up at him. "It will be ok," he reassured her. But he lied - she couldn't be ok without him. If only she could have just one more day with the love of her life, then, just then, maybe she could set thing right. Meredith would forgive him for cheating on her, and continually at that. She just needed him now, but no, he didn't want her. He wanted his mistress. She looked at him, pleading with her eyes once again. He gave her a kiss for goodbye's sake; she hoped that it coul've been longer than the small peck he gave on her lips. She stepped closer, giving him the last hug that she would probably ever give him.

_Maybe in five or ten yours and mine will meet again  
Straighten this whole thing out  
Maybe then honesty need not be feared as a friend or an enemy  
This is the distance  
And this is my game face _

They let go abruptly, as the loud speaker came on once again, urging all passengers to board the train. "You had better go."  
She nodded in agreement, leaning over to pick up her two bags, one on either side. He smiled at her on last time, and she back to him.  
"Goodbye Meredith." His face dropped somewhat quickly. He didn't hate her, he still wanted her to stay there, but all he wanted was friendship.  
"Don't say goodbye," She continued to smile at him, "Goodbye means that we will never see each other again." She said, quoting him. He always would say that to her, whether she was going on a buisness trip, or just to the store. She would say 'Goodbye Derek' as she left, and he would respond with his favorite quote. He smiled at Meredith again, rubbing her shoulder softly, "See ya later, Mer."

_There's really no way to reach me_

_There's really no way to reach me_

_Is there really no way to reach me?_

_Am I already... _

Meredith turned, starting to walk toward her train. This truley was the hardest thing that she had ever had to do. She had been through so many things together, metting her mom, going through college. . .a miscarriage. Her eyes swelled with even more tears, but she refused to cry. She remembered all of their good times together, christmas's, easters, birthdays, and their drunken new years nights. But she remembered mosst was fresh in her mind, their last meeting that happened only seconds before, although it felt like months ago. His mind wasn't even with her. She knew who he had been thinking of, and how he probably couldn't wait to get home and make love to her. She turned around to see him one last time. He wasn't in sight. She couldn't help it anymore, she let her tears roll down her cold cheeks, his hands no longer there to warm them..

_So this is your maverick  
This is Vienna _

"Goodbye Derek."


	2. City Lights, 2

Meredith turned back around, heading slowly for her train, even though she knew she should pick up the pace if she expected to make it. She couldn't help but drag her feet heavily as she boarded. Upon finding her seat, she attempted to lift her bags into a small compartment above where she would soon be sitting. She felt weak, as she always did when Derek was not around. It felt impossible to lift her things all the way up top the seating arrangement. Getting it about a foot off of the ground, her hands slipped, dropping the well over sixty pound bag onto her toe, "Crap!" She screamed in pain, trying to remove her foot from under the luggage. A tall, mid-aged man with short black hair, and chocolate colored skin quickly stepped in, lifting the bag from off her toe, and into the overhead compartment.

"Here, let me help you there," He said, lifting her other bag into the small space as well, smiling back at her. She sat down in the aisle seat quickly, grabbing her toe in pain. "Thank you," She let out a deep breath, "Thank you so much."

"It is my pleasure." He commented, still smiling at her. He waited next to her, just staring staight at her. Meredith looked up uncomfortably, not knowing why he was just gazing at her. She looked at his boarding pass, in which he held down next to his leg, recognizing the number.

"Oh! I'm sorry! You sit here. In the aisle seat. That I am in." Meredith said, trying to seem happy, but failing miserably. As she felt, she was she was doing in all aspects of her life. She shifted to the window seat, now placing her head next to the window, staring at the fogged glass. A trance quickly came over her, thoughts shifting back to Derek instantly, he was hardly never in her mind. She wished that he would come, chasing after the train, like she had seen in so many romance movies. She didn't particulary like romance movies, in fact, she liked adveturous, bloody and gorey the most, though she hadn't much time to watch any movies at all. Meredith was usually stuck. Stuck with iher/i watching those corny things, knowing that it could never happen to someone in real life. There was no such thing as love, forgiveness, and truth, she decided. After deciding that, she wasn't sure then what her feelings for Derek were. Meredith thought that surley, if there was such thing as love, Derek would love her. But he didn't, so there isn't.

She traced her finger along the fogged window, making it clear to see their surroundings as they began to move in designated spots. She first traced a large heart, and inside wrote 'M.D.',changing her mind about love. It had to exist. A smile was placed on her face as she wrote the initials. She always thought it was funny that it was 'M.D.', and that they were both doctors. She thought that it fit together perfectly. Her smile suddenly changed to a frown as a drip of water slid down from the tip of the heart, splitting the two letters in half. She was facing reality again. Tears welled in her eyes once more, threatening to pour down any second. While she sat there, the man who had helped her with her bags watched the tears proceed to fall down her face, and onto her lap. He wasn't sure what was wrong, but it was hard to watch her. Noticing the picture drawn in the fog, he could only figure that someone broke her heart. He wanted to try and get her to smile, anything, maybe just start a conversation so that her mind would leave whtever was bothering her.

"So, your heading all the was to Seattle?" He asked innocently. She was surprised that he had even began to talk to her. Nodding slowly, she wiped the tears from her eyes, looked at him, and put on the best fake smile that she could - which wasn't good at all. He laughed heartidly at her response. "You don't have to smile if you don't want to." At that point, her face immediately resumed its now normal position, a frown and a tear stained face. Truly, that wasn't what he expected her to do, so he decided to try a different approach, "I'm Preston Burke, Dr. Preston Burke," He held out his large had to her.

She sniffed a few times, wiping the tears from her eyes again, reaching her other hand out, grabbing his, "Meredith Grey. Well, Dr. Meredith Grey."

"Well, it's a small world after all isn't it!" He commented, reffering to the fact that they were both doctors. She just nodded in response, not giving away another smile unless she could help it. "Are you just moving there?" This time refering to the large bags that she had brought on.

"Yeah. A friend of the family offered me a job at Seattle Grace Hospital." Now sitting up, she was greatful for the conversation, hoping to get her love off of her mind.

"Is that so? Well then, it's a really small world." Meredith only shifted her head to the side, unsure of what Dr. Burke had meant. Noticing her confusion, he began again, "I work at Seattle Grace. Who was it that invited you?"

"Rich- umm, Dr. Webber."

"The chief? You know what? I knew you looked familiar, your Ellis' daughter aren't you?"

She smiled at this, even though she didn't like being know as 'Ellis' daughter'. She much preffered 'Dr. Meredith Grey."Yeah, thats me."

"Well then, its even more of a pleasure to finally meet you in person."


	3. City Lights, 3

_Looking for something I've never seen  
Alone and I'm in between  
The place that I'm from and the place that I'm in  
A city I never been  
I found a friend or should I say a foe  
Said there's a few things you should know  
We don't want you to see we come and we go  
Here today, gone tomorrow_

The conversation flowed rather smoothly from there. It had not only help get Meredith's mind off of Derek, not completely, but partly, it had also helped with her slight motion sickness. Preston was enjoying her company, knowing that he finally was able to meet the 'famous' Meredith Grey that was continually talked about at Seattle Grace. They discussed many matters such as who he worked with, how busy the hospital usually was, and how Richard and Ellis were doing. They quickly laughed at each other, remembering an idiotic joke that Richard would always tell. Meredith didn;t remember all of it, it had been much too long since she had seen Richard, but her memory was quickly rejuvinated. As the horrible memories of the past few weeks began to fade in Meredith's mind, laughing with Burke, he asked, "So, why idid/i you decide to go back to Seattle? I mean besides the job offer. Because, i'm sure Richard didn't write you up out of the blue, asking you to come down, did he? Did you and your mom ever make up? Or is that your plan?"

_We're only taking turns  
Holding this world  
It's how it's always been  
When you're older you will understand_

Meredith was afraid that it might come down to this. Memories rushed suddely, and freshly back into her mind. She lowered her head, thinking about everything that led up to this moment. She strained, causing a slight headache on her temple. Her smile had turned into another frown as she sat back into her seat, facing forward, trying to figure out what to say. Burke knew he hit a strong note, now regretting even asking. He didn't even mean to, it had just been on his mind the whole time, and it had slipped out. She leaned her head back into her seat, closing her eyes. She knew Burke had just said something to her - but it was all drowned out by her thoughts of what happened earlier.

_Derek had been acting strange all day. Meredith blew it off, knowing that tomorrow was their eight year 'anniversary' so to day. They had been together for yes, eight whole years, and everything was going strong, or so she thought. He had been avoiding her all day, she figured that it was just the jitters, and that he was planning something big for her_.

_If I say who I know it just goes to show  
You need me less than I need you  
Take it from me we don't give sympathy  
You can trust me trust nobody  
But I said you and me we don't have honesty  
The things we don't want to speak  
I'll try to get out but I never will  
Traffic is perfectly still_

_"Good morning my love," she said, walking into the kitchen as she saw him for the first time that day, wrapping her arm around his neck. It was more afternoon than morning, but it was always the way that she greeted him every morning, with no exceptions._

_"Hi," he said, softly; she pulled him into a quick kiss. Wanting to make it more, she tightened her grip, but Derek pulled away. "Something the matter, sweetheart?" Meredith asked, kissing his nose._

_"No." was his only reply as he pulled her into another kiss, this one deeper and more passionate, just as she hoped. As Meredith's and Derek's good friend Addison walked through the door, Derek almost dropped Meredith, slightly wiping his mouth away as if he had just been caught doing something wrong._

_"Afternoon Addison!" Meredith bounced happily, now that she had had Derek for a bit._

_She placed her hand on her hip, glancing first at Derek, then to Meredith, putting on a fake smile, "Afternoon."_

_"Derek and I were just going out for lunch," Meredith started, nudging Derek's arm flirtatiously, "Wanna come?" Even though she knew that it would only make their time together more public and boring, she had to invite her. Addison was a sister to her, and besides, both she and Derek enjoyed her company._

_"Sorry, can't make it, I have to get to work. I was dropping by to say hi," she looked at Derek, her hand still on her hip. Hiding her excitement, Meredith put on a small frown, "What a bummer Addie, maybe next time?"_

_"Maybe," she said sighing at the same time, "See you later." This was a comment more directed to Derek than to the both of them as she tunred and left the building, but Meredith hadn't even noticed._

_Later that night, Meredith was having a blast with Derek, although at times he didn't seem all the way there. At around eight o'clock, the couple had just entered a movie theatre to see 'Saw 2'. Derek knew that it would be the only thing that she would sit through, especially with the trick that he was about to pull. He set his pager to go off about fifteen minutes into the movie._

_"Mer, thats the hospital," he whispered into her ear, "I am so sorry, but I have to go. Finish watching the movie, then meet me at home." She nodded in response, upset that Derek was leaving, and enfuriated with the hospital for making him. He kissed her on the forehead, leaving her presence. Before completely leaving the theatre, he glanced back at Meredith. Her eyes were glued on the screen as she cringed in horror, and with that he took his leave._

_We're only taking turns  
Holding this world  
It's how it's always been  
When you're older you will understand_

_As it turned out, only half of the movie only captured Meredith's attention. She left abruptly, hoping that she could stop by the hospital and see Derek before she went home. She checked in quickly with the desk nurse, asking if her love was in surgery, or just checking up on patients. She was confused, and became stressed when the nurse said that Dr. Sheperd hadn't been in today. She became very worried that he might have been in an accident, oor mistakenly picked a fight with a brute. She prayed to God that nothing had happened to him as she rushed out to her car. Pulling into the driveway, she didn't see his car, but hoped that maybe his car had been towed from running out of gas or something. She ran inside, screaming out his name, as tears began to flow down her cheeks. What happened to her Derek? Trying to find some sort of comfort, she turned to the only person she could. Her 'sister'. Meredith parked her car outside of the house, and upon seeing Derek's car, she jumped out and ran to the door. He had probably went back home, and not seeing her, decided to go visit Addison. She opened the door and entered, as she did evry visit to the house that she could even call home. She was surprised that all of the lights in all of the rooms were on, with noone to be found. She quickly rushed upstairs, trying again to find Derek. She stopped for a moment in the hallway, hearing thumps and bumps coming from Addison's room. She approached it cautiously, unsure of any thoughts that were running through her mind. She slowly turned the knob of the master bedroom, hearing Addison scream in pleasure. She surely didn't want to interrupt her sex life, but she was desperate to know where Derek was. Only one of the many, many thoughts registered in her head: Is Derek in there? Pushing the door open, Meredith's eyes produced more tears than she ever thought possible in two seconds._

_"Derek?"_

_And then again maybe you don't  
And then again maybe you won't_

_The two quickly ceased their activity, both looking back at Meredith in fear. "Meredith!" He yelled as she ran out of the room and down the stairs. He quickly stumbled out of bed, falling on his head, putting on his pants. He ran after her, trying to catch up. She had run as quick as she could to get out of the house. As she reached the top of the stairs, she tripped over her untied shoelaces, collapsing, and falling down all of Addison's stairs. By this time he had caught up to her. "Meredith!" He screamed in fear for her safety. He pulled her up off of the ground, but she was still concious, and disn't even want to hear his voice. He pushed abruptly out of his arms, racing to her car, and driving off._

_You swear you recall nothing at all  
That could make you come back down  
You made up your mind to leave it all behind  
Now you're forced to fight it out_


	4. City Lights, 4

**You guys are just way too kind to me  
I love all of you comments, and i love that you guys enjoy my story! Ok, I still have a few chapters that have already been written, but is giving me a hard time right now, so its hard to get everything up, sorry!  
I don't know if you figured it out, but everything in italics is either lyrics or a flashback. My songs so far were Ch.1 - Vienna, by The Fray, Ch3. - Trust Me, by The Fray, and there is more to come! As always, these wonderful characters do not belong to me ((though I wish -)) and Grey's anatomy belongs to the wonderful Shonda, ok?**

Meredith's eyes flew open suddenly, tears rolling down her face, with Preston Burk clutching onto her forearm. "Are you alright?" He asked anxiously. Apperently, Meredith hadn't heard any of Preston's frantic calls to her as she recalled her past with Derek. She had slouched in her chair immediately after her eyes closed. Her body felt drained, her mind not working as she looked at Preston, her mouth slightly parted. She felt as though she were a stuffed doll. Unable to move, speak, and think; unable to choose when she was used, or put up on the shelf. Her stitches falling out, with nobody there to sew her back up. "Meredith?" Preston repeated for about the ninteenth time in the last hour. "Meredith, are you ok?"

"I. . ." she finally forced out of her mouth with a raspy voice, blinking for the first time she had opened her eyes with even more tears spilling out, "I'm fine."

Preston just cocked his head to the side, the same way that she had done to him when she was confused. "I don't think you are. . ." Letting go of her arm, he patted her shoulder softly, "Just try to get some sleep. This is going to be a long ride." He smiled gently, which akwardly comforted her. She had only known him for a few hours, yet it felt like he was her brother. That thay had lived in the same house for years, fighting and loving each other at the same time. Meredith never had any siblings, but when she was younger, that was all she would talk and think about. She would tell her mother first, whenever she found Ellis alone. She would explain to her that it would help her social skills, and start off her 'going out on her own.' In reality, she had no idea what she was saying; Meredith had only repested words that others had said: she was much too young to understand any of that. Once her parents were divorced, she and her father headed to Boston, Thatcher trying to escape every memory of his ex-wife. After their move, Meredith tried to convince her father to have more childred, going all out on her speech once again. Going to school, she always admired those who spoke of their siblings, whether they were complaining, or bragging, she didn't care. Meredith often found herself in the conversation of 'I'll give you my little brother for a dollar'. She had almost done it oo, if it weren't for the teached budding into her 'personal buisness' as she liked to call it.

Smiling in her head at the memories, the emotion slipped out onto her face as she leaned back into her saet once more. The fog had abandoned the window long ago, now passing the Pennsylvania terrain. Meredith enjoyed train rides, the comforting and smooth feeling, but she was slightly effected by motion. It made her sick to her stomach, and she didn't know why. Flying was worse, however, her fear of flying was long past a phobia. It was just plane wierd. She closed her eyes, deciding it was best if she tried to get a little more shut eye before they arrived at the next station.

**Ok, that one was short, sorry, I'll try to finish getting the chapters up soon! Thank you again for the comments!**


	5. City Lights, 5

**Oceans Away, by the Fray. Haha, don't worry I don't always use The Fray, but i sure do like to!**

Hours later, the sun began to peak up from behind tall skyscrapers, shining through the small window of the train, into Meredith's eyes. She awoke suddenly, shielding her face from the beautiful rays of the sun on this gorgeous Seattle morning. "We have a beautiful day, today," Preston commented as he watched Meredith poke her head up. Turning her body toward him and leaning her head against the window, blocking the sun for the both of them, she smiled, "Yes, it is indeed." As the train began screeching to a stop, many people began to stand, stretching at first before proceeding to grab their luggage and exiting the train. "This is our stop," he said, smiling at Meredith."

"Yes, indeed it is." She smiled again.

Leaving the station, Burke had offered to take Meredith's bags for her. Declining politely, she explained to Burke that she had places to go, and things to do. "Well, do you need a place to stay at least? I have a wonderful apartment."

_Figure since I'm so far gone,  
oceans away,  
I can lay my sabre down today_

"No thank you," Meredith began. Her smile no longer showed as her mind drifted back to the love of her life, "I already have a place to stay." With that, she turned around, exiting the station. She felt pathetic; every thought, every second of her day she devoted to Derek, even now, after they were no longer together. She didn't feel like talking, smiling, communicating with anyone or anything right now. Hell, she didn't even care if she had never spoke to anyone again. She knew that she would have to son however, whether it be her mom, the chief, or even just a cab driver. She did have to give him dirrections after all. She pulled her two well weighing bags slowly, as she drug her feet like she did only hours before. Train Stations had quickly become her least favorite thing in the world - besides Addison's house. Not even Addison. She would not, could not say she hated Addie. She was her isister/i. Tears poured down her cheeks again, she didn't want to hate Addison or Derek. Not now, not ever.

_I miss the words I love the words you did not say  
I miss the kiss you never gave away  
There goes the sun, oceans away_

Maybe, just maybe, she would be able to get past Derek, get past all those years that they had spent together, and meet someone new. She could meet someone new, get married, settle down. Then maybe she could go back and visit her two favorite people in the world, without any hatred or hard feelings. They would probably be together by then anyways. . . What? What in the world was she thinking? Be iok/i without Derek? Her minset completely changed, now hating Addison, and what she did to their relationship. She had taken advantage of him, end of story. Right?

Meredith stopped, thinking for a moment, the wheels on her luggage squeaking under the weight of the enormous bags. She couldn't even remember the last time he said he loved her. Had he ever said he loved her? He hadn't. . . she had said it so many times before, and he not once. She remembered at first, he confessed to not being ready to say that he loved her. But, after their first night together in bed, she thought he changed. When she said 'I love you Derek', he had sain 'You too.' She only figured that meant 'I love you too,' but he never _actually_ said it. And now, recalling back, she remembered that everytime that she said I love you, he would respond with something like that: 'you too', or 'ditto'. Sometimes she found that he had changed the subject when she brought up love.

_And days die young when you're gone and you're gone  
There goes the sun, oceans away  
And leaves the day for someone else  
Honestly I thought that we could make it all the way,  
Barefoot on beaches dancing against the gray_

Meredith's shoulders heaved lightly under her large white coat, and blue scarf as she cried silently. She didn't know what had caused Derek to sleep Addison, but she was truly afrain to know. After eight years, she thought that her and Derek were going to truly make it all the way. But now, she discovered that she was wrong. He was her home, her religion, her reason for living; now she was homeless, hopeless, and dead. Her heart was gone, Derek had refused to return it to her, and her mind was given to him as well. Her life had flipped upside down in a matter of minutes.

But now, now it was time to move on. Wiping the tears from her eyes, Meredith began again, walking towards the street. Quickly picking up a cab, she drove straight to her mothers home. Upon arriving, she tipped the driver as he helped her take her bags out of the trunk. Knowiign that her mother would probably be at the hospital rather than at home, she let herself in. Little memories filled her head as she stepped into a familiar threshhold, with the same familiar scent lingering in the air. It had been years since she had been in the house, but the smell was fresh in her mind.

_But stone by stone the castle crumbled to the ground,  
I stood and stared as you started to fall into the waves.  
There goes the sun, oceans away  
And days die young when you're gone and you're gone  
There goes the sun, oceans away  
And leaves the day for someone else  
Here's to the man of your dreams_

Slowly but surely, she pulled both of her suitcases up those same wooden stairs, and straight into her old bedroom. There was dust everywhere ((not only in her room, but all over the house)), and it seemed as though her room hadn't been touched since she left. Her same bed, sheets, pillows, pictures, games, and trophies from previous experiences were in perfect position, as if never moved from their rightful place. The house was dank, and now filled with the smell of mildew as her nose adjusted. Looking around, she noticed may cobwebs, and even a pair of dirty socks that she had forgotten when she moved to Boston with her father.

She left, downstair and into the kitchen, browsing through the pantry and fridge. She found some cheez-its, her favorite snack again and decided her mother wouldn't mind if she had a bite. Taking a handful of chips out ((eating was her favorite comfort)), she shoved them all into her mouth, instantly spitting them back out onto the floor. "Uck!" was all that she could manage. she took a glass out of the cuboard quickly, and filled it with the sink water. She drank it down before she even knew it, then glanced back at the box. iexp. Sept. 19, 1990/i.

"1990! Mom really must never be home nowadays. She can't even keep her pantry in check." She told herself, sarcastically. Glancing around the kitchen, she approached the telephone, her jaw dropping as she saw that her mother had well over 400 unheard messages.

_I take it all in a box and make my way down to the shore,  
Throw it in and begin to leave it to the waves  
Leave it to the waves  
Leave it to the, leave it to the, leave it to the waves_

Meredith left back up to her room, unzipping both of her bags. She thought that she could make herself at home, maybe cleaning up a bit for her mother while she was out saving lives. It was the least she could do for showing up unnanounced, and expecting her to let her stay for awhile, maybe even live with her again. She pulled out her clothes out of the first bag, laying them down on the bed. The first 95 pound bag was now empty. She dreaded opening her second, that one more like 150 pounds, and most likely the one she dropped on her toe, which by the way, still hurt. She stalled briefly, and taking a deep sigh, decided that it was her fault for taking it. Opening it revealed evry single last note, picture, scent, and sweet memory that Meredith held on to Derek with. Browsing through only a few pictures, and smelling the bag, which smelled stongly of the cologne he wore everyday since she met him, she wiped more than one tear from her eyes, remembering the promise she made to herself earlier that day as she rode to her mothers house. She would let Derek go, move on, and try never to thin of him again. She new the last part would be impossible, and considered the first part as well. Zipping the bag back up, Meredith rushed downstairs and found ducktape. With this, she proceeded to wrap the bag up as tight as she could, hoping never to look at it again. She opened the attic up, placing it in the ffurthest corner away from the door. It was time for her new life.

**Ok there we go! Another update soon  
**


	6. City Lights, 6

It was only the next morning, but Meredith still had to be at the hospital and 4:30 for a meeting with the chief, and with her new resident. She got up quickly, getting dressed while stubling out of the shower, and eating on her way out the door. She wanted to make a good first impression, even though she had already won over the chiefs trust years ago. Climbing into her blue Jeep, she put the keys into the ignition while placing her reheated grilled cheese sandwhich into her mouth. She liked today- it had only been 15 minutes since she had been up, but still, she was too busy to even think of Derek, which surprised her. Usually she would still be hudled in her blankets crying her eyes out as she stared at the ceiling, but it was different now. Maybe it was a good thing that she had caught Derek in bed with Addison. Maybe it was a signal that she didn't really need him all this time. She didn't want to say that it was a waste these past years -- because it wasn't. She had learned so much from him, she probably couldn't name all of great things that he taught her. But now, now things were going to be different, she could use everything that Derek had taught her about school, medicine, love and life to find out her true identity, who she really was and who she really wanted to be.

Pulling into the hospital parking lot, she jumped out of the car with her brand new totebag filled with everything you could imagine, and darted inside. In such a hurry, Meredith ran right passed the elevator, and bumped straight into a short woman, already dressed in her light blue scrubs. "Oh I am so-" she began as the lady turned around, clearly tired and angry.

"Oh no, don't you dare say it!" She cut her off, "'Cus I know you 'aint!" She quickly glanced at her up and down, "Now watch where your going scrawny, your in my way. Do it again and i'll be sending you into that hospital bed right there." She pointed across the hall to an empty room.

"Oh, well, i'm-," she stopped, remembering what the small lady said, "Well, ok, I will try not to do it again."

"Try? You had better not try, you had better do!" Meredith opened her mouth, hoping to respond "And don't you start talking back to me now!" The woman said, "Now, git! Get going. I don't want you in my sight anymore that humanly possible." Shocked by the doctor's rudeness, Meredith turned and sped away once more. "I'm gonna have to see you enough how it is," she said under her breath as Meredith ran away.

Knocking on Dr. Richard Webber's door, Meredith was gasping for air. She had run every which way throughout the hospital, memorizing every hall until she found his office. Richard was unsure as to who was knocking on his door so early in the morning; he sat back in his chair, leaving abandoned papers on his desk as he removed his reading glasses. "Come in," He spoke to the closed door, nonchalantely. The door only peeked open at first, wandering eyes following it, as if unsure what to do. Richard sat forward in his chair, plaging his elbows on his desk, folding his fingers together. "Come in," he repeated. Slowly afterwards, the door opened fully, revealing the young, blue eyed, golden haired girl. She wore a large smile on her face, with a hand hanging low to her thigh, while the other grasped the handles of her tote as it hung from her shoulder. "Meredith?" Richard questioned excitedly as he stood up, rushing to the door and bringing her into his tight grasp.

All Meredith could do was hug back. She didn't really know him all that well, but what she did know was that he was there for her mother, and thats all that really counted. "So you recognized me?" She asked, pulling out of his bear-like grip.

"Of course I do Meredith! You are a spitting image of your mother." And with that, he smiled warmly to her. Smiling back, but feeling uncomfortable in the arms of a man she didn't really know, she began quickly, "So, when do I start?"

"A little anxious are we?" He stepped back behind his desk, motioning for Meredith to sit in front of him before sitting down himself. "You are just like you mother." Smiling again, she wondered whether that was really a compliment. She thought back to all of the fights that Ellis would start with Thatcher, nearly nocking him dead to the floor each time with insults. An awkward silence occured briefly, in which time Richard thought he should begin speaking again, "Today, you can start today, if you like. But definently tomorrow if you are not ready, which is perfectly understandable." He assured her.

"Oh, no! Today? Today is great!" She answered quickly. She remembered how thoughts of Derek had filled her mind almost immediately only moments ago when the conversation had stopped. Working was her comfort. Wroking, that is, and eating. She flashed a small smile to Richard as he began to stand up. She followed shortly after. "Ok, well, we'll give you a quick tour-"

"Oh no, theres no need, I gave myself one." Meredith interrupted, remembering how she had gotten lost on the way to his office.

"Well, aren't you on top of things?" He laughed lightly, heading towards the door. "In that case," he said opening it for her and stepping to the side, "Your locker is already set up, number 1232, your scrubs are in there already, and your fellow interns have already started their shifts. Your resident is Dr. Bailey, and believe me you'll know her when you see her." Meredith only tilted her head in confusion. "You'll see, don't worry." He smiled to her again, "Good luck!"

"Thank you Dr. Webber," she said, leaving the office.

"Oh please Meredith, you can call me Richard."

"No, really, it's fine. I shouldn't get any special treatment, and I don't expect you to give me any!" She turned, rushing again, this time to the lockers.

"Just like your mother," Richard commented softly to himself before reentering his office, getting back to his work.

**Ok, I had to start Meredith off with a good day, no? And guys, don't worry, I plan to make her have a very good day!**


	7. City Lights, 7

**Ok, as we all know, the charcters of Grey's Anatomy belong to Shonda! Thanks for reading  
**

Meredith rushed to the lockers, throwing all of her possesions in as she took her scrubs out. She would have to catch up, and quick to everyone if she planned on making a good first impression. Although she almost knew that she would be let off the hook for being the Ellis Grey's daughter, Meredith wasn't going to take any chances. Her heart pounded inside of her chest, clearly trying to escape its confinement in a hurry. Just as she pulled her blue scrub top over her head, the door opened and Meredith turned quickly, with a jump, to see who was there as she pulled her hair out from under her top and proceeding to put it up into a pony tail. As he entered, all she could do was smile in his presence.

"So, you finally made it." He poked in.

Her smile grew wider at his comment, "So I did."

He smiled, just as she did at her response. As he looked at her up and down, he noticed that she looked only a bit disheveled with her messy hair, and half-applied make-up. "You might want to fix that," he laughed as he circled his finger around his own head and face, implying that she should fix her hair and make-up, and anything else that looked like a wreck on her own face. Glancing into the mirror, she heaved a large sigh, "I'm not usually this ugly," she complained with a smile.

Letting out a large bellow, he looked back up at her, "No your not, I remember. You looked very beautiful the last time I saw you."

"MmmmmHmmmmm," She laughed, "Thanks."

"I heard that your with Bailey," he said, leaning against the doorframe in his deep blue scrubs, the door still wide open from when he entered.

"That I am."

"Uh-huh, well it was nice talking to you Dr. Grey," he began turning from the room, "You'll do great, don't worry."

"Hmm, ok Dr. Burke," She smiled at his confidence in her, "I'll talk to you later."

"Well, you'd better!" He said raising his voice as he left the room so that she could hear him.

Smiling to herself, she proceeded into the coridors of the hospital, searching frantically for her resident. Stopping by the nurses station, a smile still perched on her small face, she questioned the two nurses, who were helping her find her new boss. Only laughing at her, they explained that she would probably be down in the pit with the rest of the inters. Meredith was puzzled at the fact that the two had began to laugh and giggle when she said that she was on Bailey's 'team'. They said 'good luck' waving tauntingly at her as she left. Her smile had turned into a look of confusion, heading down the hall towards the pit. Waiting for the elevator, her heart began to pump harder, her stomach feeling as though it was plunging into an endless pit. She let out a deep sigh as she felt her hands; they were sweating and sticky. Meredith hadn't felt this nervous in a long time, and she wasn't quite sure why she was either. She usually wasn't nervous at all, she could handle anything. Afterall, she iwas/i Meredith Grey, she gloated to herself, which didn't happen very often either. Glancing to her side, she couldn't help but notice a man's eyes fixated on her. She smiled; he was cute. He smiled in return as the elevator doors opened. She was relieved that she was in now, away from his piercing glance.

**Sorry that these have been so short guys! I'll try to make them longer, I promise, with some more songs in it too**


	8. City Lights, 8

**Ok all my lovey dovey's, here is yet another update because I love you al, and I am just hoping that all of you love this story! Can't take my eyes off you, Frankie Valli! And remember, italics is either lyrics or story, and i'm sure you can figure that part out! ;)  
**

Upon reaching the pitt, Meredith looked frantically for her resident. Dr. Bailey. . .was it a he or a she? She couldn't even remember if Dr. Webber or Dr. Burke had given any details about her mystery boss, but if they did, she had surley already forgotten every last bit of it. Maybe she could just look for a pack of youngerlooking people who didn't look like they knew what they were doing -- those would surely be the interns. She, on the other hand liked to think that she did know what she was doing, even though she was an intern. Afterall, she had dated a nuerosurgeon for eight years. He had even become best in the whole country. Meredith liked the thought that even though she was showing up late into internship, she still had a clue of what she was doing because of Derek, but she also resented that thought. Every memory would come flowing back soon through her head, his dreamy smile, his warm tough, his beautiful eyes, and the most gorgeous hair that she had ever seen. He also _knew_ how to wear a suit. Stopping dead in her tracks, she closed her eyes for a moment to remember.

_  
You're just too good to be true.  
Can't take my eyes off you.  
You'd be like Heaven to touch.  
I wanna hold you so much.  
At long last love has arrived  
And I thank God I'm alive.  
You're just too good to be true.  
Can't take my eyes off you_

_____It was their fifth anerversary together, and all Derek told her was to look nice, although he reassured her again and again that she was the most beautiful thing in the world, no matter what she wore. This night he wanted to be very special. He would take her out the the fanciest, most expensive restaurant that he could find ((although he knew Meredith didn't care about that at all)) and then take her ballroom dancing, which was a big step -- he never danced, for anyone. _

_____She walked down the stairs when the time was right, wearing a gorgeous black halter top gown that hugger her body tightly, revealing every curve on her body. There was a long slit up the side, complementing her long, slender legs that she wore with black heels. She held a small black purse accompanied with a black sheer shawl that hung around her elbows, lacing through her arms. As she proceeded, she encountered Derek. He wore a pin stripe black suit; talking to Addison at the bottom of the stairs, Derek hadn't noticed Meredith heading down. His back faced the upstairs, as he leaned on the railing, explaining to Addison his exact plans for the night. _

_____  
Pardon the way that I stare.  
There's nothing else to compare.  
The sight of you leaves me weak.  
There are no words left to speak,  
But if you feel like I feel,  
Please let me know that it's real.  
You're just too good to be true.  
Can't take my eyes off you_

___________The conversation came to a halt when Addisons eyes glimmered at the sight of Meredith. A smile spread across her face as she turned her attention from Derek to her. Taking the hint, Derek turned to face her on the stairs. Nearly passing out from his loss of breath, he clutched tightly onto the railing, with his other hand in his pocket. A smile slowly krept onto his face as he stared directly at her, imagining everything that he could and would do to her tonight. Her blonde curls bounced at the side of her face as she took a few more steps down the stairs, before stopping and looking directly at Derek, smiling. He looked so handsome with his suit on, he really wore it, and fe finally ditched the tie and bow tie; it looked good. His hair remained for the most part, the same, but it was slightly done with gel to tame it._

___________"Wow," was all that he could say, meredith taking another few steps until she reached ground level with him._

___________"Wow, indeed," She said, smiling as she looked him up and down._

___________"You look. . . .beautiful -- no, gorgeous, classy, dazzling, exc-"_

___________"Derek."_

___________"Yes?"_

___________"Your rambling," she smiled._

___________"Oh," he smiled back, just as sweetly, "Sorry."_

___________Her only response was a small giggle as he wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her in for a kiss. She placed her hands on his chest, it was lasting longer than she expected. "Oh quit it you two," Addison hit them both, playfully as they pulled away, still looking deep into each others eyes, "Your going to be late for your reservations!" She scolded, rushing the couple out the door. "Now have fun! And bring her home by ten!" Addison yelled at them as they left, pretending to be her mother. Meredith laughed loudly at Addison's act while Derek raised his hand and waved her off, opening the door for Meredith to get in._

___________  
I love you, baby,  
And if it's quite alright,  
I need you, baby,  
To warm a lonely night.  
I love you, baby.  
Trust in me when I say:  
Oh, pretty baby,  
Don't bring me down, I pray.  
Oh, pretty baby, now that I found you, stay  
And let me love you, baby.  
Let me love you_

___________________The night had gone by perfectly, Dinner was excuisite, and dancing was to die for. Ballroom dancing lessons, something she definently never saw Derek doing. She was especially entertained when the teacer picked out Derek as an individual, claiming that if there was one way bnot/b to do it, it was Derek's way. And with that, bhe/b, the dance instructor took Derek into his arms, trying desperately to show him what he was doing wrong; all Meredith could do was laugh at her boyfriend as he danced with the instuctor. She giggled in the car on the way home, remembering the incident._

___________________He glanced over a few times, quickly, with a bright smile on his face, "What? Whats so funny?"_

___________________"Nothing," she laughed, "Oh, nothing, nothing at all!" She let out one last hardy chuckle before biting down on her lip, surpressing every other giggle that remained in her body._

___________________"Ok, ok, It wasn't that funny!" He laughed back at her, Meredith bursting into a laughing fit. _

___________________"Yes! Yes it was!" She let out between her small snorts, holding her stomach in pain._

___________________As they pulled into the driveway, he quickly unbucled, lauching himself on top of her, tickling and exciting her in her seat. "Derek, no, no stop!" She screamed at him, almost jokingly, as she wished him to go on. He stopped abruptly, which dissipointe her as her laughs began to turn into steady breaths. He leaned in, quickly and began to kiss and nibble at her neck all the way up to her earloe, and eventually to her mouth. Laying down across the two seats, her head against the door, Derek crawled on top of her, making sure that he could reach every square inch of her body. He pulled her dress up as she pushed his pants down with her fingertips. Not wasting any time, Derek began pushing into her, soft and easy, although fast-paced. She moaned into his ear, placing both of her hands into his hair, grasping it tightly._

___________________  
I love you, baby,  
And if it's quite alright,  
I need you, baby,  
To warm a lonely night.  
I love you, baby.  
Trust in me when I say:  
Oh, pretty baby,  
Don't bring me down, I pray.  
Oh, pretty baby, now that I found you, stay_

_____________________________Upon finishing their round, Derek collapsed on top of her, panting wildly. Her hands remained in their place, on the back of his head. "Derek," She began, in between breaths, "I love you."_

_____________________________Thie side of his face rested on her breasts as she stroked the back of his head. A smile played on his face, and although she couldn't see it, she knew it was their. This caused a bright smile to grow on her face as well, "Ditto." He kissed her chest quickly, before continuing onto her neck and face, as he had not too long ago./i_

___________________Feeling a small person push into her side, Meredith quickly snapped back into reality, opening her eyes, realising that someone had run into her. The small lady was barking out orders, Meredith realized shortly after; the woman looked up at her, placing her hand on her hip, "Watch where your going scrawny, your in my way."_

___________________"Oh, Im --" she decided against the apology, remembering the last encounter, "But, you ran into me." Meredith replied, honestly._

___________________The woman's mouth crept open, leaning on the leg on which her had was rested. The four others behind her, pressumably those who she was scolding stood their, almost shocked. One of the two guys had his hand to his mouth as he turned his head to snicker. "Excuse me?"_

___________________"Um, ahem" she began, clearing her throat, "Well, I was just. . . well, standing here, and you kinda rand into me." Meredih had said this, making little hand motions here and ther, almost explaining the situation themselves. There was a long pause of silence before Meredith decided to speak up again, "I'm looking for Dr. Bailey."_

___________________Looking at her up and down once more, she replied, "Your looking at her and it 'aint doin' you no good, so try somthing new." Her mouth drooped open, dmbfounded; she felt like a complete idiot. Before she could even think of what to do next, Bailey started up again, turning her attention away from Meredith, "Yang, your with Dr. Schaffer, Stevens, with Dr. Burke, he needs a intern quick, go," They both nodded their head in agreement, running off in either direction, "O'Malley, your with Torres. Karev," she turned to Meredith, "Grey, you two are with me today in the pitt." Smiling, she made her way to the emergency doors, awaiting the next truck full of idiots._


	9. City Lights, 9

**Yaaaaaayy! Another update, I'm so proud of myself! Oh, and guys, sorry for the AMAZING amount of typos that I tend to have in my updates! . I'm not too good at double checking them and whatnot, so they end up really crappy and all, you know? Well, sorry anyways, I hope that you can still read all of it! Lol**

Meredith's day in the pit continued to drag along slowly. Fifty pound weights pulled on the day even harder, making the seconds that she waited for ambulances felt like years by themselves. Even Dr Bailey,_Dr. Bailey_ was leaning against the walls, eyes closed, on the verge on sleep. Alex Karev took this chance to slip away and talk to a beautiful young lady who had lost her way. Meredith was the only one awake, standing tall and alert, waiting for the coming ambulance that had surely hit traffic. She crossed her arms, rolling her eyes as she glanced back at her flirting colleague. Pulling into the hostital, the ambulance's sirens tuned off, and Bailey awoke, rushing to meet it with Meredith following at her heels. The doors swung open, another ambulance pulling in at the same time.

A young male paramedic stepped out of the truck, and began helping the two take the patient out of the back as he spoke to the two doctors, "Jose Ramirez, 9, was hit my a speeding car while riding his bike across the street, the driver presumably drunk. He was lauched into the nearby neighbors tree. . ." As they pulled the young boy out of the car, Bailey and Meredith were absolutely stunned by what they saw. A young boy sitting on a gourney with a tree branch straight through his stomach, still concious, and crying, grasping and clawing at his oxygen mask in attempt to get it off. "Mommma!" He cried inbetween his slow sobs.

"We have been trying to calm him down, give him sedatives, but nothing has been working," The young paramedic explained, "He has been at it since we found him.

"My God," Dr. Bailey said under her breath, "Umm, Doct-doctor Grey, take him. . . just go! Prep him for surgery, and do it quick! He's bleeding everywhere!" Meredith quickly nodded in agreement, taking up her professional tone and attitude, she commanded that the paramedics follow her into the hospital, explainng that she was in charge and would be caring for the young boy.

Alex rushed out quickly to the ambulances, "You gave Grey the case?" He asked, a cocky and angry tone to his voice, "She just got here! I --".

"Shut up Karev! You take responsibility and keep your small dick in your pants, and you might actually be liked and respected around here! I'm tired of your slacking and complaining," Bailed continued, now picking up her pace as she rran along side the driver of the car into the hospital, "Your banned from surgeries today, you've been getting on my nerves way too much lately!" She finished as she dissapeared into the corridors of Seattle Grace. He only glared angrily at her, before tuning and continuing his work in the pit.

Meredith rushed down the hall without Jose. She had been told that she had to get the boy x-rays, and now she was on her way to pick them up, when she ran into Izzie. "Oh, Dr. Grey!" She rushed over to her, Meredith exasperated. "Izzie," She began in between breaths, she had ran every which way in the hospital since the boy was emitted, "Please, could you go pick up results for patient Jose Ramirez?" Izzie looked questioningly at her for only a moment before taking off at a fast pace to retrieve the results. Her surgery with Dr. Schaffer had been canceled anyways, she may as well get in on another, right?

She ran once more back to Jose's room. He was still crying, with no way to calm him down. "Where is the mother?" Meredith asked desperately.

"We called, but here was no answer at the house," A nurse explained, "And we can't get anymore phone numbers out of him."

Meredith decided that she had to take this into her own hands. She rushed to the crying boys side, taking his hands in one of hers, stroking his hair with the other. "Ssshhhh, Jose, it's going to be alright," she tried to sooth him.

"My, my, my, my momma!" He cried out again, grasping her hand with both of his.

"Ssshhh," she calmed once more, "Jose, everything is going to be alright, my name is Dr. Meredith Grey, you can call me Meredith. . ." she began, now checking his pressure, as well as pupil dialation again, "Or Dr. Grey, or just Grey if you like. Merri is nice, or, you know what? Whats your favorite color?" Her voice ws calm and motherly as she began to stroke his hair again.

"I --" he sniffed, his crying dying down a bit, "I don't know, I, I, I like blue, and green."

"Well then, you can call me Dr. Blue or green instead of Grey, how about that? Or you can call me lady, or absolutely anything you want." She was getting desperate, anything to keep the child from having an anxiety attack along with his other extensive injuries. He nodded his head in return, only slightly though, his sobs now only two small rivers running down his cheeks. She wiped them away politely, smiling at him. "Ok."

As Izzie turned the corner, reaching Jose's room, she found a tall man blocking the doorway. He was leaning on the doorframe, and as Izzie glanced inside the room, she realized that she was admiring Meredith, or so it appeared. "Dr. Schaffer?" She asked, interrupting his thoughts.

Standing up straight, he turned to see Izzie, who was giving him a questioning look, "Dr. Stevens," he nodded, acknowledging her, before looking back into the room at Meredith, and then back again at Izzie, "WHat are you doing here?"

"Well," She shifted, both her eyes and body. He was amazingly gorgeous, which made it hard for her to look at him without drooling. "Dr. Grey had asked me to pick up Jose's x-rays, they need them before they start the surgery, to see where they will have to operate."

"Dr. Grey?" He questioned, a smile almost illuminating his face. He knew exactly who she was speaking of.

"Yes," she said, unable to take his peircing green eyes anymore, she stepped into the room, handing the x-ray's to Meredith.

"Jose," Meredith began slowly and softly, taking her hand off of his head and placing them on the x-ray's, "I have to go for just a little bit, ok? I need to check your x-ray's and then i'll come right back, I promise."

"No! Please Dr. Green! Don't!" Tears began to well back in his eyes, "Please don't leave like everyone else!" He pleaded, grasping her hand with the rest of the energy he had left.

She didn't know what to think, what the boy was trying to say. Maybe he was trying to tell her something deeper, or maybe she was just looking too deeply into it. "Don't worry, Dr. Grey," Dr. Shaffer chimed in as he stepped next to her and Izzie, taking the papers into his hand, "I'm the one preforming the surgery, I'll take a look at them." She thanked him with a nod, without really noticing his prescence, her eyes had yet to be taken off of the young boy. Now taking a seat on the bed next to him, she soothed Jose, this time with comforing, embarassing stories about how she got hurt when she was a child. These stories ammused Dr. Schaffer, he was getting to know her without actually getting to know her, and he loved it. Most of the stories she told were silly, or just plain comical. Jose laughed with her, which made her happy as they began to push him into an empty OR. They were greeted by Dr. Burke, who smiled at Meredith. Looking up, she smiled back quickly bofore immediately turning her attention back to Jose. She stood next to him, doctors had already filled he room, as they pulled out "the happy gas."

Jose refused, "I'm scared Dr. Green," He protested.

"Don't be," She stroked his hair as she did before, "Everything will be alright, I promise," and with that, she smailed sweetly.

"But, but everyone else, when everyone else came in, they never came back out," He said sadly, bowing his head.

"Jose," She lifted his head, "Everything will be alright. I will be here the entire time, and nothing can happen to you while I'm here."

"The _entire_ time?"

"The entire time."

"Promise?"

"I promise," she held out her pinky finger as he placed his own in hers.

"Ok."

"Ok."

Dr. Burke and Dr. Schaffer continued to stare and smile gently at Meredith. She was handling everything perfectly. Placing the mask on the young boy face, Meredith asked comforitngly, "How high can you count?" And with that, he began to count for her, not even getting to fiive before he was well asleep on the operating table.

**Yaay! Done! **


	10. City Lights, 10

**Back away, not today, update lady.  
This one's real short, sorry! I've got another one on the way though. This is my last prewritten one, so sorry, but you can't be expecting quick updates anymore, ok? I'll try to keep it up, but schools a killer.**

The surgery with Jose had gone as smoothly as could be extected. He had a tree through his gut, and he was only nine years old, it just seemed too good to be true that he was even living. Meredith stayed with him most of the time after the surgery, tending to his every need, even though he wasn't concious to bark out orders, she wanted to be there if anything went wrong. She almost felt as though it was her complete responsibility to watch over him, and protect him until either he awoke, or his parents were there to do the work for her. It was right after lunch, and Meredith came once more to check on her 'little man', as she now called him. Picking up his chart, she examined all that had happened in the moments that she was gone.

"Dr. Grey," A strong voice came from behind her, giving her a jump. She turned, smiling at her fellow doctor.

"Dr. Burke," She replied.

"I'm glad that you were on this case," he began to explain, "It's always nice to have an intern who knows what their doing on a case of this magnitude." And, at this moment, another tall and handsome man had made his way to the doorway of the room, leaning on the doorjam as he had done previously.

"Yes it is," he chimed in, flashing a beautiful smile, "I wouldn't have chosen anyone else." He agreed with Preston.

"Oh, Dr. Schaffer," Burke said, turning to see his colleague, "I didn't know you were here."

"Well," he began as he walked into the room, "Now you do." Meredith only looked back and forth throughout the conversation from one gorgeous man to the other. She was speechless, not because of their compliments, but purely because of their beauty. A fake smile tugged slightly on her face as they both turned to her. A long silence occured not too long after Dr. Schaffer had spoken. Realizing the uncomforing feeling that dwelt in the three's stomachs, Burke decided to break the sweet peace, "Dr. Meredith Grey, this is Dr. Aiden Schaffer." With that, he stepped out of the way to allow the two to shake hands.

"Its a pleasure," she commented, quietly.

"The pleasure is all mine," he shot straight back, a bit louder than Meredith, "You can call me Aiden if you like."

"Dr. Schaffer is fine," She smiled, this time sincerely. She still needed to keep her distance from beautiful men -- lately they hadn't done her any good. She turned back to Jose, stroking his head as she pulled up a chair and sat next to his bed. "Dr. Burke, where do you thin his parents are?"

Preston stood, now crossing his arm, and opened his mouth to speak, but quickly decided not to tell Meredith what he knew. "I don't know," he lied. Aiden had quickly picked up on his lie and shot him a death glare. Burke, only nodding in return, began once more,"Come Dr. Grey, the nurses will take it from here." Looking at him reluctantly, Meredith stood her ground next to her young patient, "I would like you to meet a friend of mine," he said, smiling politely at her. Before letting go of his hand, she sighed deeply and leaned next to his ear, "I will be back, I promise."


	11. City Lights, 11

Meredith followed Burke out the door, past Dr. Schaffer, and straight into a nearby on-call room. Turning on the light, he revealed to bodies lying lifelessly on either bed. The one on the top bunk had shifted only slightly, turning over and coving herself up with the blanket. The blonde one on the bottom, however, launched right up, nearly stumbling fully out of bed. She looked familiar to Meredith, ah -- yes, she was the one who fetched Jose's test results for her. Burke laughed at the two as he looked back at Meredith.

"Wha-what?" The young blond doctor questioned, pulling herself to her tired feet, "Do you need something Dr. Burke?"

"No, nothing Dr. Stevens, I just wanted to introduce you to our new intern, Dr. Meredith Grey."

Rubbing her eyes, Izzie pushed her back forward, cracking her back before turning side to side for the same effect, "Oh yes, we worked on the little boys case together," she recalled, "Nice to see you again Dr. Grey." She held out her hand, "Sure we've met, but I don't think that we have been properly introduced, I'm Dr. Isobel Stevens, but all my friends call me Izzie."

"Dr. Meredith Grey," she replied with a smile, shaking her hand, "It's a pleasure Izzie."

"Would you three SHUT UP?" Came a loud, frusterated voice from the top bunk. She lifted herself up on one elbow, turning to face the three doctors; her dark curly hair was pulled back into a small bun at the back of her neck. Her scrubs were wrinkled, presumably from her sleeping, and she didn't look very happy, "Ok, I'm on call tonight! I expect to get SOME sleep, so could you guys like, be quiet? You know, leave me alone so I can do my thing?"

"And thats my Cristina," Burke commented, smiling, placing his large hands on his hips.

"_Your_ Crisitna?" Meredith inquired. He smiled at her, nodding in response. Gosh did she feel stupid, this whole time Meredith had thought that Burke had been flirting with her, and now here he has a girlfriend!

"God Preston, just tell the whole world why don't you?" She said before turning back around on the bed, placing her head back on the pillow.

"I'll work on that," he shot back smartly, "Goodnight." He said before turning back around, facing Meredith. Small mumbles came from Cristina on the top bunk, and Izzie almost immediately collapsed back into her bed. Motioning to the door, Burke led Meredith outside of the on-call room, turning off the lights and shutting the door as he left.

"Your Cristina?" She questioned again, "Your an attending, she's an intern," with that, she smiled, placing her arms across her chest as she leaned onto one leg. She shook her head lightly in attempt to remove the hair that had fallen into her face.

Burke's laughed, opening his mouth to respond, but his pager went off, saving him from the conversation, "Sorry Grey, gotta go!" He started a fast paced jog down the halls of the hospital.

"We're talking about this later!!!!" She shouted at him, throwing her arms down at her side. His hand waved carelessly in the air as he turned the corner, acknowledging her previous comment. Sticking her tongue out, she smiled, walking over to the nurses station.

"Don't you think thats a bit childish?" Dr. Schaffer interrupted her thoughts, biting down into a large, green apple. He was huched over, leaning fully on the counter, opposite of Meredith.

Holding her smile, she thought it might be nice to someone new, "I like being childish."

"Oh do you? Well, in that case, I like it when you be childish." He smiled sweetly at her, still chewing his last bite.

"Is that so?" She leaned on the counter in the same manner he did.

"It is."

She gave off a small giggle as she looked down at her hands that rested on the counter in front of her before looking up again to meet his gaze. Aiden had his own type of charm to him, like Derek. He gave her a dreamy smile that could melt anything while taking another bite into his apple. Here was her chance to start over, to take her life to a new level, leaving Derek and everything in her old life behind. "So, are you on-call tonight?"

"Me?" he asked, almost laughing and practically jumping out of his skin, standing up straight as he threw the core of his apple into the trash. She looked around playfully, as if trying to see if anyone else was around.

"I don't see anyone else here."

"No, but I could be if you wanted me to." His smile still illuminating the hall.

Cocking her head, she stood up straight, turning around, and placing her elbows on the counter as she leaned back in a comfortable position. He quickly rounded the table, placing himself in front of her. Meredith bit down on her bottom lip, still amiling at Aiden, "What?" He asked curiously, now his turn to cock his head, "Whats so funny?" He asked sweetly.

"Oh, nothing!" Now laughing, Meredith looked down at her now beeping pager, "Sorry, Aiden, I gotta go." Leaving quickly, she turned around to smile at him one last time before she took off around the corner.

"Did she just call me Aiden?" He questioned himself.

**Ok, a little cheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeezy!!! But, hey, what can I say? I'm a cheesy kind of person!!!! Hope you guys like it, no telling when I'll be able to get the nuxt update up, ok? This wasn't as long as I hoped, but I gave you a lot to go on, no? Thanks for the love! **


	12. City Lights, 12

**Aiden belongs to me, while the other, good characters belong to Shonda!**

Despite Meredith's behavior, and their conversation that night, Aiden headed home. He thought that if he left the hospital, he could escape these crazy feelings that he had, and the dirty thoughts that accompanied them; however, he was completely wrong. Lying in bed, he imagined what life would be like if Meredith was in his life. He had always had samll realationships in high school, after all he was a nice, smart, and very attractive guy. But, after his junior yeah, Aiden had lost his thoughs in studies in science. Fascinated by every aspect of the human body, he decided to become a doctor. As he entered college, he almost totally lost interest in women, he had thought that he had become asexual; that was until he met a wonderful woman in his first year of med school -- his teacher. She was much older than him, but had extensive knowledge in every subject, and was extremly beautiful, but, of course, she was married. The two persued a relationship, despite the fact that she had a husband. But, after only about a month into the relationship, Aiden realized that he was feeling more in lust than in love. He decided to immediately break it off; the guilt that consumed him was more than he could bear, so he moved to Seattle to restart med school without any interruptions or interferences with his future career. Pledging to himself that he would never fall for a girl, he stuck like glue to his work, becoming one of the best surgeons in the world. He knew that he was known everywhere, for he visited many other countries on vacation as well as buiness trips, where others would greet him with open arms because of his success. He lay on his bed, now, contemplating what in the world this feeling could be everytime he saw Meredith. He would practically drop everything that he was doing, jumping out of his skin, and going out of his way to see her. But, he barely knew her, which confused him the most. How could he possibly feel this way about her while only knowing her for a day?

He rolled, tossed and turned in his bed all night wondering what this could mean. Hadn't he sworn anything besides medicine off? Then why would all of his thoughts go straight back to her? If he did let her in, if she let him in, would he become a worse doctor like he always feared? Deciding that he was going to give it a try, Aiden smiled, closed his eyes, and drifted into a deep sleep, his thoughts, now dreams, faded back to Meredith.

The next day, Aiden entered the hospital, determined to find Meredith. He would ask Dr. Bailey for her services, after buttering her up with an amazing surgery, he would ask her out for a drink. Nodding in approval of himself, he stepped into the elevator, heading to his office. Leaning against the back corner of the elevator, he pulled out his organizer, making sure he had nothing to do for the night, and seeing when his next free night was; so at the end of the night, he could reply smoothly, 'I'll pick you up at 7 Thursday night'. He felf goofy as he practiced this line over and over again in his head. Tonight and Thursday night would be their date nights for this week.

The elevator stopped before Aiden's floor, but he figured he could get off here; he could take the stairs from this point. Elevators weren't much of his thing, he was always afraid that he would get stuck with some claustrophobic freak who would drive him crazy, and besides, he needed the exercise. His mind slowly changed as the doors opened, revealing Meredith. Looking up she smiled at him, lifting her arms up quickly before dropping them back to her side, "I got off on the wrong floor," was her excuse.

Aiden smiled back with a small chuckle as she entered the elevator. He took his place back against the corner of the elevator, smiling at her as he stared at her beautiful body. Her back was turned to him, but she could feel his eyes upon her back. Turning halfway around, noticing that he was smiling, she smiled back in confusement, "What?"

"Your going to be late," He cocked his head to the side as she did the night before.

"I already am," she assured him, turning back to face the elevator doors. He pushed himslelf off of the back wall, walking up behind Meredith, making their bodies almost touch. A shiver went down her spine as his hand 'accidentaly' toucher her thigh for a brief second, "You smell nice," he whispered into her ear.

Luckly for her, the elevator came to her floor, and the doors opened. Stepping out, she turned back quickly, "I am so taking the stairs next time," she said, smiling, as she rushed off towards the lockers. He smiled, turning the opposite direction towards his office. Today would be a good day.

**Ok, like I said, a short update. A little more into Aiden, I hope it made sense to you guys. In the next few, I'm going to be trying to build the relationships of Meredith and Cristina, Meredith and Burke, and Meredith and Aiden. Why? Do you ask? Because Meredith is the main character, and she needs lots of relationships to keep her mind from drifting! A main focus, I think, will be Mer Burke and Cristina relationship. I think it's going to be an important factor, but of course we need some Aiden and Mer, no?**


	13. City Lights, 13

**Aiden is mine, and as we all know, the rest of these beautiful characters belong to Shonda!**

Meredith's day was going by perfectly, she had gained a strong foundation with Cristina as well as Izzie, and a small one with George and Alex. Aiden had let her in on the most amazing surgery that she had ever seen; now, that may be because she was in there, because it was a rather texbook proceedure, but she enjoyed every secong of it. He even let her hold the scalpel, guiding her hand as she cut. It made her feel like she was on one of those typical miniature golf dates, where the boy would wrap his arms around the girl and "teach" her how to put, except for she was cutting open a head, rather that golfing. She thought of Derek during the surgery, but only thinking that she was going to be ok without him; afterall, Aiden was falling hard for her, and he was just as smart, and almost as gorgeous as Derek was -- or rather, is.

Her shift was over, she smiled to herself about the possibilities of her and Aiden together, they would make the perfect couple, but then her mind quickly faded to Derek, and how she thought the same thing when she met him. Everything was so well in their relationship, she just couldn't see why Derek would cheat on her, with her ibest friend/i!!! Especially since her and Addison were basically sisters, or at least thats the way they treated each other. Addison and Meredith knew each other basically since they were born; their mothers were friends, and their mother's mothers were friends. In thier first year of college was when she met Derek and brought him into both her and Addison's life, it didn't seem all that long ago. . .

_It was a calm fall day, the leaves had just began to shed their colors for new ones, as they abondoned their posts high on their tree to meet with the ground, as they did every year. Addison and Meredith were ecstatic to finally be out of the drama filled highschool, and into real life -- college. Comparing their scheduals during a lunch break, they were suprised to find that they had the same science class together._

_"Oh Meri! This is wonderful! I can't believe that we actually get a class together."_

_"Yep! Isn't it great? Oh, and it starts in a half hour, we had better get going!" And with that, the two picked up their books and rushed to their classroom. It was large, larger than they had expected. The took seats near the aisle, but not on it; Meredith sat on the outside while Addison sat on the inside._

_"Oh, Meredith, I can't see the board from here, i'll be right back, let me go get my glasses."_

_"Ok, but you better hurry!" she told her as she stood up, "You don't wanna miss the first part of the lecture."_

_"Yeah, yeah," her mind now occuping something else, she tapped on Meredith's shoulder, pointing to the other side of the room at a small group of guys, "Dude, Mer, he is so checking you out." Upon looking, Addison grabbed her face and pulled it back to face the front of the class, "You can't look! Then he'll think your easy!"_

_"Well, is he cute? Maybe I am!" She said with a wink._

_"Ok, ok, he's heading this way!" She said frantically._

_"Calm down Addie," she laughed, "He's just a guy!"_

_"ok, ok, I'll go get my glasses, you can talk to him, and then tell me how it goes, ok?" She asked as she began to leave._

_"And with my luck, your the one who he'll have been checking out!" She whispered loudly, not noticing that he was now standing right next to her._

_"Well, your luck has just improved, then!" He replied to her 'whispered' comment. Turning back around, she finally got a glimpse of him -- Addie was right to run, there was no way that she would be able to talk to someone so absolutely gorgeous without slipping up somewhere along the way. "Is this seat taken?" He asked, not waiting for her response as he sat down. He was giving her the most dreamy smile, and all she could do was smile back._

_"No," she replied, rather late to his question._

_"Good, then you won't mind if I sit here."_

_"Not at all," now feeling more confident in herself, she sat up straight, giving him her full attention. They stared at each other for a long while, smiles plastered on their faces, not noticing much else in the room._

_It had been a long while before Addison returned, in which he decided to break the slence, "So, this Thursday, lets say 5:30 at the cofe house across the street?" He made sure to finish this before Addison could here any of the conversation, even though he knew that she would probably tell her as soon as she left._

_"Huh?" She asked, stepping out of her daze, "Oh, yeah, sure, of course, um, um. . ." _

_"Derek," he filled her in._

_"Derek, right. Meredith," she extended her hand, he then grabbing it for a short shake before he turned to leave._

_"See you then, Meredith."_

She snapped back into the real world as a large hand was placed on her shoulder. She turned quickly, meeting familiar green eyes. "You ok?" he asked curiously.

"Oh," she cleared her throat, "Yes of course Dr. Schaffer, thank you."

"Yesterday it was Aiden, and now its Dr. Schaffer?"

"It was never Aiden, I think that you are mistaken Dr. Schaffer," she smiled flirtatiously, she needed to get her mind off of him quick.

His only reply was a smile back in her direction, as he started to walk with her outside, placing his large hand on the small of her back. Once he escorted her all the way out to the car, he began again, "Let me take you out tonight."

Meredith looked up at him, cocking her head -- it had now become 'their thing'. "Where?" She asked. This was a relief, he figured that she would just drop the big fat 'no' bomb, and drive off, but this, this was a start.

"Anywhere you want," he said, smiling.

Shutting her car door, Aiden figured that he had just moved too fast, but that was ok, he was seeing her boundaries. Maybe he could eventually get around to her. "I like tequila," she said after rolling down her window as her car started, "Wanna buy me a drink?"

"I'll buy you anything you want."

**Ok, so I added a little Mer/Der, and a little Mer/Aiden, I think that will satisfy me. . . for now. **


	14. City Lights, 14

**Here we go again! I'll try to find a picture of Aiden, you guys will have to hold off until then, no?**

Aiden arrived at Joe's, quickly spotting Meredith at the bar with a shot in hand. His heart jumping, he rushed quickly to take a seat beside her before anyone else could. Looking over, meredith smiled at his jubulant facial expressions, as well as manners, "That seats taken," she flirted.

"Well, then whoever was sitting here will have to find another spot now, won't they?"

"I guess so," she laughed.

"I thought you were gonna let me buy you a drink!" He pointed to her shot of tequila. Downing it quickly after he said that, she rotated her stoll so that she was now facing him.

"Firstly, who says you can't pay for that one? And secondly, i'm not even near done," She said, winking at him. It sent chills down his spine, just knowing that Meredith was playing with him. All he wanted was a relationship with her; he wanted her to want him, and be with him and love him. It sounded scary to himself once he finally admitted it. All he could think about was how stalkerish it seemed, and he surely didn't want Meredith to get the same impression. So, he decided to slip into it as slowly as she wanted, no matter how long it took.

"So, you wanna drive me home?" She cocked her head, smiling devilishly at him. Maybe she _didn't_ want to take it slow, which suprised, but pleased him.

"I would love to," he said, standing up, placing his jacket around her shoulders, "Shall we?"

"We shall," she stood up, holding the ends of his coat lightly on her so that it wouldn't fall off. He placed some money on the counter before following closely behind her.

"So," he began playfully, "How exactly do you plan to get to work tomorrow?"

"Hmm?" she inquired.

"You know, I'm taking you home, beacuse your drunk," he added in quickly, "And you shouldn't be driving while you are intoxicated, you could get a DUI, or even worse, you could get hurt!" He wanted to make sure that she didn't back down from the ride home, as well as force her to ask him to take her to work tomorrow, "So, since I am taking you home now, you won't have your car tomorrow to get to work."

Meredith stopped, turning around to face him, laughing, "You have really thought this out, haven't you?"

Smiling, he replied with a quick "No."

"Well then, I suppose the smartest thing to do, would be to take my car home. Then you could maybe stay the night, unless of course you want to walk all the way back here. At night. In the dark. Alone. And then in the morning, we might just have to stop by Joe's to pick up your car, huh?"

Aiden was now practically jumping out of his skin. He tried as hard as he could to hide his excitement, but Meredith saw his eyes light up instantly, "Oh darn," he joked, "I guess we might just have to do that!"

Meredith, still facing him, took a few steps closer, closing the space in between their bodies. She still held the jacket on her shoulders, but intentionaly placed herself right next to his lips. Looking down, their faces were only centimeters apart. She smiled, "Is it wrong to fall for your boss? Hypethetically, I mean." she whispered, their faces not moving.

"Hypethetically?" His voice was so low, she could barely even hear it. He smiling, he licked his lips quickly.

"Hypethetically,"she repeated, closing the space between their faces, bringing him to a long, passionate kiss. Her hand remained on the shoulder of the jacket, while his found his way around her waist. They pulled away, staying close to each other. December was approaching, and the winds were cool. A breeze blew passed, sending goosebumps up and down Meredith's arm. He smiled, he wasnt cold at all; taking her arms in his to keep them warm, he pulled her into his body even moreso that she already was, "We should get going," he told her, still whispering.

"We should," she smiled back, "It's getting cold, I just feel like crawling into bed."

"That sounds like a good idea to me," he said, turning her back aroung as he lead her to her car. By the time they reached it, his chest was pressed against her back, with his hands placed protectively on her waist. Leaning over, he pushe all of her hair to one side of her neck while kissing the other, causing her to giggle, "Key me," He said, smiling inbetween kisses.

"Ok, ok!" she reaches into her purse, retrieving her keys before turning around and hitting him on the chest, playfully, as she placed the keys into his hand. He pushed her against the passenger's side of the car, continuing his kissing down her neck, "Aiden, Aiden!" she smiled, laughing even more, "Stop, stop that tickles!" HIs only response was to go back further, kissing the side of her neck, and up to her ear, he now laughing himself.

Pulling back, he ooked into her eyes, quickly running his hand through her hair, "Hypethetically? No. . . Is it wrong to fall for your emplayee?"

"Hypethetically?" She asked, cocking her head.

"Hypethetically," he confirmed, smiling as he pushed his forehead against hers.

"Hypethetically, yes, but I won't tell, I promise, hypethetically I mean."

Laughing at her response, he opened the door for her, "Just get in," he said, slapping her butt before he left to the other side of the car.

"Dr. Schaffer!" She scolded, poking her head over to see him smiling at her.

"Yes Dr. Grey?"

"Make sure that kind of behavior never happens at work!"

"Yes Dr. Grey." They both smiled, laughing at each other before getting into her car and heading home.

**Yaaaay, lots of Aiden! . . .Yay, right? oO;;;;;**

**Tell me, yay or nay for Aiden? How do you like him, I must know!**


	15. City Lights, 15

**Ok, so here we go**

Aiden quickly jumped out of the car as they arrived at Meredith's house. He wanted o make it to her door first, open it for her, maybe woo her, sweeping her off her feet ((literally and figuratively)) and take her into the house. Meredith, on the other hand, had plans. She jumped out of the car herself, racing onto the lawn. At first confused by her antics, Aiden stared blankly at her. She laughed at him for having such a stupid expression on her face, giving him a flirtatious look. He quickly realized that she wanted to play around before getting to buisness. They chased each other around the lawn for quite sometime, their smiles never peeling from their faces. She rounded the tree that stood in her yard, hiding behind it. He hesitated, not sure which way he wanted to go, but figured either way he would catch her. He took a left, as she raced right towards the door. Before reaching it, he snatched her around her waist, pulling her small body into him as she had a laughing fit. She held tightly onto his arms as he spinned her in circles around the front yard.

"Aiden! No, no stop Aiden!" She cried out laughing, "I can't breathe, I can't breathe!"

He slowed down, fliping her around so that she faced him in his arms. She wrapped her legs around his waist, holding her up while she breathed heavily from their little game, "Apparently you can!" He said, laughing at her. He pulled her in kissing her gently as he headed toward the door with Meredith around his waist. Her elbows rested on his chest, her hands on his face, never pulling away from his kiss. They hit the door, and Aiden fumbled with the car keys, hoping that there was a key to the house hanging somewhere off of it. Luckily, there was, and he found it quickly, unlocking the door, letting them both in. His tongue now in her mouth, he set her on the floor to guide them into her room. Making a mental note of where everything was, and which direction to head to her room, she practically dragged him upstairs. He stumbled, only a few times, and they laughed in between their kisses, finally making it into her room. Tossing the keys to the side, he lifted her up once more, placing her down on the bed. She smiled, beginning to lift his shirt over his head as he did the same for her. He quickly inched his way out of his pants, leaving him only in boxors, pulling Merediths down gently. Sitting up, they smiled at each other as he threw them across the room. Aiden pulled the covers over them, Now taking off her bra and underwear. She found herself removing his boxors as well as they roughly tumbled around in her bed. Pushing himself close to her, she felt him get hard, and her mind immediately went back to Derek, and their first time together, it was very similar to this. He touched her the same way, with the same passion; she closed her eyes, taking her back to her first time, remembering Derek's voice and how he felt in her, but, looking up, she realized that it wasn't Derek there, it was Aiden. He was getting ready to start when Meredith suddenly cried out, bawling. Startled, he sat back up, pulling himself away from her.

"Meredith, mer baby, whats wrong?" He tried comforting her, running his fingers through her hair, "I'm sorry, I am so sorry," he got up, pulling his boxors and pants back on, "This was too fast, I'm sorry."

"Do- Just don't appologize!" She yelled at him, angry that he was being so nice to her. She sat up wiping the tears from her face. Aiden stopped getting dressed, his shirt in his hand as he sat back down on her bed next to her, "It, it just, it wasn't you ok? There is just too many things you don't know about me, and you wouldn't understand where I was coming from." She continued to wipe the tears from her eyes, now regretting everything. There was her chance at a new life, she saw it, flying right out the window, but then she heard him, "Try me." He said softly.

She looked up to find him smiling gently at her; he placed his hand on her cheek, wiping away the tears for her, "Really?" He nodded sweetly in response to her soft question. Taking a deep breath, she figured that she might as well get it over with, "Aiden, I'm broken."

He smiled at her, cocking his head, "And?"

"And? And what?"

"What happened? Your broken, I understand, but you can't glue yourself together by yourself. Let me help you." This was just about the last thisng she expected to come out of his mouth. Did he really wanna know? Or maybe he wanted to be able to take advantage of her while she sobbed into his arms; she didn't care anymore.

Sighing again, Meredith began, "He was so perfect, in every way. It was just -- everything just seemed right with him, you know what I mean?" He nodded, feeling the same way about Meredith, "We were perfect together, we loved each other more than anything for eight straight years."

His eyes widened, he was completely dumbfounded; she was just in an eight year realtionship? "Eight years? Thata a long time."

"Yeah I know," she nodded, "We loved each other so much, and then one night. . .the night of our freaking anniversary, he sneaks out of the movie theatre, pretending he has to go to the hospital for an emergency, when he really went off to screw my sister!"

"Oh Mer," He pulled her into his arms, "I had no idea, I am so sorry."

"So, I moved here, to get away from him, to get away fromn _them_."

"Does your mother know what happened? I mean between you and your sister?"

Smiling, she leaned into his bare chest, "She wasn't my _real_ sister, but it sure as hell felt like she could be. I guess, then, she would be considered my best friend, not my sister, huh?" She laughed lightly.

"It's ok, Mer. Everything will be alright now, I promise."

"I'm sorry, Aiden, I'm just not ready to be fixed yet."

"Shhhh, It's ok, just lay down, close your eyes."

**Yeah! so thats it! I have a plan for the next one, so hold on tight, ok? I have a huge essay that I haven't started due tomorrow! and i have to finish it.**


	16. City Lights, 16

**Ok, my plans are all coming into play now!!! I already know exactly how this fic is going to turn out now, all I have to do is piece it together! There is a little language in this chapter, if you care  
THE FRAY! Yay, I love them -- 'look after you' is the song!**

_If I don't say this now I will surely break  
As I'm leaving the one I want to take  
Forgive the urgency but hurry up and wait  
My heart has started to separate_

Meredith woke up the next morning, fully dressed after her 'experience' the night before. She felt horrible for what she did to him, afraid to see him at all that day. 'The only way to avoid him is to. . .there is no way to avaid him,' she thought, remembering that she offered him a guest room after what had happened; she would have to drive him to Joe's this morning, and then he would probably ask for her services at work, she was screwed. Looking at the clock, she realized that if she din't get going, fast, that she would surely be late for work. Hoping out of her bed, she rushed over to her closet, tripping over a pair of pants. Falling to the ground, her elbow gave into the ground at an awkward position, causing a large moan from the floor, as well as a yelp from Meredith. She rolled onto her back, holding onto her elbow as Aiden came rushing in.

"Mer? Oh my gosh, Mer, are you ok?" He said, lifting her into his arms.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine," she tried to think of an excuse for him to leave so that she could finish getting dressed, but she accidentaly fell into his eyes. They were beautiful, filled with concern and love. Instead of forcing him out as she did the previous night, she began to speak again, "Yeah, I think I'm ok," she said, adding in 'think' this time around, "I just tripped, thats all. . .fell on my elbow," she smiled.

He smiled back softly, pushing the hair out of her face and behind her ear, "Ok." He started to get up, with her in his arms, but Meredith put her hand on his arm signaling him to stop.

"I'm sorry. Sorry about last night."

"Thats alright," he assured her, "Things happen, emotions surface, and then things just happen." He brushed some more hair out of her face.

"Ok," She said softly, feeling even worse for what she did to him.

"Now get dressed," he said, picking them both up, "Your already late for work how it is." And with that, he left the room, closing the door behind him.

"Ow. . ." she said to herself, rubbing her elbow as she turned around to get dressed.

_Oh, oh, oh  
Oh, oh, oh  
Be my baby  
Oh, oh, oh  
I'll look after you_

Arriving at Joes, Meredith places her car in park and lets a small breath of air escpe her lips. There is a long, but comfortable silence; she decides to beak it, "Sooo. . . here we are!"

"Here we are," He repeated, smiling at her. Besides cocking their head at each other, Meredith and Aiden loved to repeat every word that came out of each others mouth, almost as if it were a game. The silence followed once more for just a few minutes, "Meredith?"

"Yes?"

"You know I'm always going to be here right?" He looked now from the front windsheild back to her, wondering how she would take it, if he was still going to fast for her. She looked back at him, almost pleadingly; he figured he might have to kick it down a notch. He needed to give her space, but ne needed to tell her so badly how he felt.

_There now, steady love, so few come and don't go  
Will you won't you, be the one I always know  
When I'm losing my control, the city spins around  
You're the only one who knows, you slow it down_

"I'm going to be here, to look after you. And I'm not leaving, so just, just take your time, ok? I'm not trying to force you into anything new, you've been broken, and I understand that its hard to pick yourself up, but just to let you know, I'm here." Opening the door, he finally pulled himself out of Meredith's car, looking back only once to smile before getting into his car and driving off to the hospital. She let out a heavy sigh, closing her eyes and leaning back into her driver's seat. Everything was going to be ok with Aiden, everything would be alright without Derek. . .

Speeding down the halls of Seattle Grace, Meredith was barely on time as she rushed into the locker room. By the time she reached her locker, she was practically already stripped down, browsing through her contents to find her scrubs. "Rough night?" Cristina commented, looking around cautiously to make sure that the other interns had already left.

"I cried, before it even started," She replied, simply.

"Oh damn Meredith! Your in deep shit now!" She laughed, already knowing what her knew freind was talking about.

"No, no I'm not. He said it was ok, he spent the night, we woke up, had a freindly conversation, and he said it was alright." She said quickly in one hefty breath.

"Ohhhhhh. . .damn Meredith. . . your in even deeper shit than I thought!" She laughed again as she exited the room.

"What? Whats that supposed to mean?" She chased after Cristina after slamming her locker shut.

"Look, here's how it goes," she started, leaning against the nurses station as Bailey read some charts few feet away, "You take a guy home, you sleep with him, let him go the next day: a normal routine, no?"

"No. . ." She sqeased in quickly, but quietly.

"You on the other hand, take him home, and cry before he even gets into you! A normal situation in that awkward situation: he gets pissed, leaves, you never see him again in your entire life, get the drift?"

"No," she squeased in again as they began to follow Dr. Bailey down the hall.

"Real lover boys, for instance the one you took home, whoever he may be, go on and on about how to find their true love. You see those guys everyday until either they drop dead or you do."

"Ok, I am so not following you, Cristina."

"He wants you. . ." she stared blankly at her, "TO LOVE HIM. Do I have to spell it out for you? A long termy is what you got on your hands."

She froze in her place, finally realizing what Cristina meant. He wanted to be her next Derek. "Crap." she said under her breath.

"Morning Dr. Bailey!" Came an all too familiar voice from behind Meredith. He stopped beside her, looking down at her as she looked up, "Morning Dr. Grey," he said softly; she put on a plastered smile for him.

"What do you want Schaffer? I'm trying to get my interns off, do you mind?" Bailey asked, placing her hand on her hip.

"Now Miranda, is that any way to talk to your boss?" He smiled, almost flirtatiously to get off the hook.

"Thats Dr. Bailey if you please, and since when do I give a damn whether your my boss or not?" She said, looking him up and down.

"Well then, I'm sorry to interrupt you." He said nodding his head, "May I borrow your intern?" He placed his hand on Meredith's shoulder.

"Not today you can't." She replied sternly, "Dr. Burke has already requested her, although Dr. Stevens I'm sure youd be more than happy to accompany you."

Izzie tuned on a smile instantly at Dr. Bailey's 'recomendation'. "Of course, I would be privilaged to work under you today Dr. Schaffer," she said trying to suck up; not only would he get her into amazing surgeies, he was drop dead sexy too.

"Oh, yes, of course, thank you Dr. Bailey," he flashed a quick smile, dissapointed that he couldn't work with Meredith. And with that, Aiden and Izzie went on their way to meet with their patients.

"You heard me Grey, your with Burke. Yang, your with me. Karev, Dr. Griffin has requested you in OB/GYN, and O'malley, Dr. Torres, now get going!"

They all quickly rushed to their requested stations. Meredith, trying to find Dr. Burke, turned a corner sharply, running into a large body, "Ah, Dr. Grey, It's been to long."

"Yes Dr. Burke," she said, recomposing herself, "Yes it has!"

"How have you been?" he asked, taking up two charts and handing one to Meredith as they waltzed down the halls.

"Very well, thank you."

"Have you gotten over him?"

Stopping instantly, she looked straight into his eyes as he turned around to meet her, "Excuse me?"

"I'm not quite sure who 'him' is, but you sure seemed upset on the way to Seattle. A heart on the window?" He laughed, "There is no mistaking love."

Meredith just stood there, not quite sure what to say. He was talking about Derek, was it really his buisness? He was seeing right through her, and if he could, that probably meant everybody else could. Now is the time where she really needed to let go. He raised his brow, waiting for her to continue. She dazed away for only a second before following him through the halls

_If ever there was a doubt  
My love she leans into me  
This most assuredly counts  
She says most assuredly_

Besides that rather embarassing and awkward encounter with Preston, the day went on rather smoothly for her. She wasn't on call, which made her happy, and she had an early night, which made her ecstatic. As she left the hospital, she found Aiden putting his belongings into his car. Looking up, she smiled sweetly at him, he giving her the same smile back. He waited outside of his car with the door open, giving Meredith time to approach, "Where ya headed?" She asked, putting her hands behind her back, rocking from heel to toe like a child.

"Well, I was going to go home," he gave her his dreamiest smile, "And dream of you."

Cocking her head to the side, she bit her lower lip, smiling, "Wanna come over?" Deciding earlier that he would move at he pace, he nodded happily in agreement. "Good." She replied, quickly rushing to her car and climbing in. When she arrived at her house, Aiden was alredy there, leaning against his car. He smiled, opening the door for her as she turned the car off.

"Welcome home," He nodded.

"Why thank you," she giggled, holding her hand out to him. He took it wilingly as she led him into the house. They stayed up in the kitchen for about an hour talking before they both headed to bed, her to her room, and him to the guest. Meredith changed into her pajamas quickly, thinking about what had happened earlier today; what Preston had said, but more importantly, what Cristina said. She slipped out into the hall, making her way down to the room in which he resided. The door was slightly ajar, peeking in, she saw the side lamp lighting the room dimly; he sat next to it, reading a textbook on surgeries. She pushed the door open slowly, making sure that it didn't make any noise, slipping in and turning around to shut it just as quietly as she did when she entered.

"Meredith?" He asked, putting his book down on his lap. She turned around suddenly; she had hoped he wouldn't notice that she entered, which was stupid, considering the bed as well as Aiden face the door. She only smiled, walking slowly to the side of his bed, where she stood a bright smile still plastered on her face. Removing the book from his lap and pacing it on the dresser, she straddled him, and placing her hands on his chest, leaned down and gave him a deep kiss. She pulled away not too long after, resting her forehead on his now smiling face.

"I'm ready." she said softly, almost in a whisper.

"Ready for what?" he whispered back.

_Oh, oh, oh  
Oh, oh, oh  
Be my baby  
Oh, oh, oh  
I'll look after you_

"Ready. Ready to be here, ready to look after you, ready to be yours. . . .ready for you to fix me."

_It's always have and never hold  
You've begun to feel like home  
What's mine is yours to leave or take  
What's mine is yours to make your own  
Oh, oh, oh  
Oh, oh, oh  
Be my baby  
Oh, oh, oh_


	17. City Lights, 17

Months passed by with Meredth and Aiden getting a little bit closer every day. They had somehow managed to keep their relationship under wraps at the hospital, no one except the two, and of course Cristina and Burke, knew about the relationship that they shared. Meredith never fully trusted Aiden, she was afraid to; the two were not nearly as close as her and Derek were, but they were making it, which made both of them happy. Cristina and Burke are still together, and struggling, as usual, with the differences in how they percieved what an actual 'relationship' was. Like Meredith, Burke never trusted Aiden, except in his case, not at all. He felt like the older brother that he never had the chance to be, protecting Meredith at all costs; Burke was sure that Aiden was too 'attached' and 'clingy' to Meredith, as the readers proclaim. He made sure that Aiden wasn't moving to fast, for his pace rather than Meredith's, by constantly requesting double date nights, which seem to upset Cristina, but not even faze Aiden. Aiden loved to hang out with Meredith, Cristina and Burke. They were all so open to each other, sharing personal feelings, as well as teasing one another with complaints of "Just lay off" or "Next time lets leave Aiden home". . . . .little did he know these weren't teases, these were those 'personal feelings' that he was so happy to share.

--------------------

Meredith sighed deeply, exiting the hospital at about 10 00pm. She had gotten off work early enough, thankfully, but it had truley been a long day. She had been through a few surgeries, many, many frusterating patients, she didn't have enough time to eat breakfast, luch, or dinner, and considering the fact that she had been on call the night before, she ws exhausted. Only one thing could cheer her up in a situation like this,

"Hey Meredith, baby!" And unfortunately, that wasn't it.

"Hey Aiden," she said, tiredly as she reached her car.

"You ok hun?" He kissed her on her forehead.

"Yeah i'm fine," she smiled, causing him to do the same, "Just really tired."

"Tired?"

"Tired."

"As in. . .too tired to have Dr. Yang and Dr. Burke to come over tonight?" He asked, almost scared. She just smiled back, letting out a little giggle. "I thought that they might be able to help." He continued, "You have been so down lately," He brushed the hair out from her face.

"Thanks babe." She smiled; she was so happy that Aiden always tried to do everything he could to help her out. He always noticed when she was out of it, upset or confused, doing anything within his power to cure her. "I'll see you at home," she kissed the tip of his nose before getting into her car and turning it on. Immediately, loud music blared from the stereo's, much louder than she usually had them, with a band that Meredith didn't usually listened to.

"The Clash?" He questioned as she left the hospital parking lot.

Arriving 'home', Meredith opened the door, refusing to enter past the entry way. She looked around this old house that was once her mothers, that she was now forced to call home. Today was one of the worst days that she had had since she arrived in Seattle, it was her and Derek's would-be ninth anniversary, and she couldn't forget that, not ever. She did everything that she could to remind herself of him, making her angry and happy at the same time; in fact, just thinking of Derek now made Meredith the happiest girl on earth, rather than the most upset. She didn't know why, it was probably because of the differences between him and Aiden, but she wasn't sure. It made her laugh thinking about what Derek would have to say about Aiden, probably that he was a 'pansy' or say something about how horrible of a surgeon Aiden is, although he was a pretty good one. Meredith snuck up into her bedroom, logging herself onto the computer. She glanced through many pages about 'Dr. Derek Shephard' that she had googled. Apparently he had become an excellent surgeon, one of the best in fact, which made her extraordianrly happy. She read small, 'interesting facts' about him, including his pet peeves, his pets, little quirks and whatnot, all of which she knew. Then, then she ran into a very interesting fact, as she scrolled down, she leaned in closer to the computer, realizing that he wasn't married. He hadn't even been seeing anybody for the past 10 months. Meredith had left only 10 months and 3 weeks ago, meaning that he had a relationship with Addison a maximum of a week after she left, unless, of course, they kept it hidden, which was very possible, and to Meredith's standards, probable.

"Meredith?" Aiden's voice rang from the doorway, breaking her thoughts. She hadn't notice him come in. She closed the window quickly, making sure that Aiden hadn't seen it.

"Yeah?" She asked, turning around in her chair.

"Cristina and Burke are here."

"Ok, I'll be right down."


	18. City Lights, 18

**Lets see if I can confuse you all, eh? ;) This is a Phone Conversation, just so you know! And here we go**

"Hello?"

"Hey."

"Hey! Whats going on?"

No response came.

"Ok, whats the matter this time? Did you screw up iagain/i."

A small laughter filled the reciever, "No, its just. . .today. . ."

"Today? Whats so special about today?"

"It's. . . .today."

"Ok, just spit it out already!"

"Today, today would be our ninth."

"Your-- ooohhh, your ninth with Meredith?"

". . . .Yeah."

"So, what are you going to do about it?"

"What a--what am I going to do about it?" Laughing, almost histerically, "What CAN I do about it? Tell me that, ok? Just tell me WHAT to do, and I'll do it." The anger was rising quickly in his voice.

"Call her."

". . . . . . I can't."

"Ok, I tell you what to do, and you CAN'T????? Well then, tell me what to tell you and I will so that you can do it!"

"Ok, ok, just stop! I can't process that right now, it's too confusing."

"It wasn't confusing. . ."

"Well just DON'T! She is all I can think about! I can't process anything that i remotly out of the ordinary."

"She has a boyfriend."

"What?"

"A boyfirend, you know what you iused/i to be, yeah, she has one."

An awkward silence filled the gap inbetween their conversation

"You haven't told her yet have you?"

"Tell her what? There is nothing to tell!"

"You didn't tell her what hhappened between you and Addison."

"Do -- DO NOT mention her!"

"Well, Maybe if you just EXPLAINED WHAT HAPPENED, then we wouldn't even be having this conversation at all!"

"No, no she deserves better. She deserves better than me."

"Oh puh-lease! Save me the sob story!"

"Is he better than me?"

"Personally, I think -- no. He is gorgeous, thats a given, nice, gives her space when she needs it, is understanding about you and --"

"ME? He knows about ME?"

". . .Kinda."

"What does he know?"

"Well, I think he knows that there is this guy, who lives in New York, presumably you, that completely broke her after eight years together. . . ." Another small silence filled the air, "Call her."

"I can't."

"You can! Just do it! You have absolutely nothing to lose! Tell her, just tell her you wanted to be friends now!"

"Friends? Friends?? You want me to call my ex-girlfriend on our would-be ninth anniversary and tell her that I want to be her FRIEND? That would be cruel!!!"

"Only if she hasn't gotten over you. Your assuming she hasn't gotten over you."

". . .Has she gotten over me?"

"I donno."

". . .Um, ok, look, I gotta go. . .I gotta. . .just think, mope and think."

They rolled their eyes, "Ok, go ahead and do that. Thats the Dr. Derek Shephard that we all know and love." Came the sarcatic response.

"Yeah. . .Whatever, later."

"Ok, whatever."

"And thanks, for everything."

"No problem Derek."

"Bye."

"Bye."


	19. City Lights, 19

**This is for all of you who love Aiden! Aiden belongs to me, while all other Grey's anatomy characters belong to Shonda!**

Meredith followed shortly after Aiden down the stairs to meet Preston and Cristina. The couple was sitting on one couch together, taklng to Aiden, who was sitting across from them on another. She loved how he could get along with any of her friends. Their conversation came to a halt when she entered.

"It's about time." Cristina said in a voice so pissed off, only Meredith could recognize the tone that she gave.

Preston stood up, hugging her and kissing her on the forehead, "I haven't seen you in days, hows the hospital?" He asked as she sat down next to Aiden, a little too close for both Preston's and Cristina's comfort. Aiden placed his aarms around her, now leaning back into the sofa.

"Oh, busy as usual." She made herself comfortable, leaning back into Aiden's arm.

"Oh really. . ." Preston had not really payed attention to what she had said, his eyes fixated on Aiden, and what he planned to do.

"Yeah," She placed her hand on Aiden's thigh,"And Aiden's been there with me, so its been good."

"What do you mean by 'with you'," Cristina chimed in, "How is your sex life?"

"Cristina!" Meredith shot back, blushing, "That is not a conversation we need to get into!" Aiden laughed slightly, placing his head in his hand, massaging his teples with his thumb and index finger.

"Why, cuz there is none?"

"Preston! Make her stop!" Meredith pleaded.

"Don't get mad because Preston and I have great sex, and you don't get any!"

"Cristina," Preston play scolded her, "We shouldn't do that."

"What? Just because Dr. Schaffer here doesn't have any balls--"

"CRISTINA!" Meredith yelled, then turning to Burke, "Preston?!?!?"

"Im sorry Meredith, there is just no stopping her." He commented, hardly even trying to stop Crisina; he was glad that he had a girl like her who he could easily say 'put him in check' in situations like this.

"Both of you, out!" She said, standing up, "Just get out!"

Both Burke and Cristina stood up, pissed off --only you couldn't tell with Burke's expressions, only Cristina's. She followed them to the door, grabbing Cristina's arm befoer she left, "I don't know whats gotten into you, but this really needs to stop!" She whispered, "I'm finally happy here, and all I need is your support!"

"Oh screw you Meredith," She replied, whispering, "You know you aren't happy, you know I know your not happy. I know that every freaking day that you think about your precious McDreamy in New York; apparently the only one who doesn't know is Aiden. So just do us all a favor, dump him, call your precious fuck buddy, get him down here, and just. . ." She stopped, now more sympathetically, "Just do it Mer, you just really need to do it."

"I'm, I'm just so sorry Aiden." Meredith said as she walked back into the other room.

"It's ok sweetheart," He said, standing up and wrapping his arms around her small waist, "It's not your fault." He kissed the top of her head as she leaned into his chest. She only let out a soft moan, more complaining then pleasurable when he bagan to stroke her hair, "Whats the matter."

Looking up to meet his eyes, he cocked his head to the side. She smiled, there was one way that she could take Derek off of her mind, and prove Cristina wrong, "Lets go to bed."

"Yeah, ok. You have had a long day at work today, go get some rest." He smiled.

"iLet's/i consists of more than one person, me iand/i you!" She said, beginning to pull him up the stairs.

"Oh," he smiled, following her a little bit quicker now that he had realized what she meant.

"Lets prove Cristina wrong."

"Alright. Lets prove Cristina wrong."

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

The next morning, Meredith woke up in Aiden's arms. She smiled to herself as she snuggled deeper into his chest. "So, Your awake?" His voice startled her.

She looked up at him, smiling, "So, Your awake!"

"I am."

"I am."

"Did you have a good night?"

"Hmmmm..." she closed her eyes, "After Cristina left, or before Cristina left?"

He chuckled lightly into her hair, taking in the small scent of lavender that remained, "After."

"In that case, yes I did, I have a very good night."

"Good, me too." He pulled her in as close as he could to his chest, "You have to leave for work in a half hour."

"A whole half hour?? Well, in that case. . ." She pulled herself up, now stradling him.

"This looks so familiar," he joked as he rolled her over onto her back and attacked her with kisses.


	20. City Lights, 20

Meredith rushed, almost late once more into the locker room. It cought the attention of all the interns, but mostly Cristina.

"Better watch out Meredith, Bailey might ride you for being late again," Izzie explained as the three left the room, leaving Cristina and Meredith alone.

"You have GOT to be kidding me!"

"What?" She was still very mad at Cristina, but couldn't wait to brag that they had sex the previous night, and that morning.

"You slept with McCreepy on your anniversary?"

"Excuse me?" She said, closing her locke and heading outside, following the rest of the interns, "First of all, my would-be anniversary, secondly, I told you, I'm over him! If he didn't want me screwing another guy, then he wouldn't have screwed Addison!" She nodded, both of them stopping as they met Bailey.

"Why the Hell are you two late?"

"Oh I wasn't late, I was just talking to Meredith," Cristina spurted out, "Meredith was late, not me."

Bailey looked at her angrily, "Karev, OB/GYN again, they love you there," she began, tearing her attention away from the two, "O'Malley, your with me today. Stevens, Schaffer. Yang, Grey, pit and rectal exams." She smiled at them. Before she couls shout at them as her usual dailey routine, she heard a phone go off.

"Oh, oh I am so sorry Dr. Bailey, I need to take this really quick." Izzie said, taking out her phone. She stopped, as she looked at Bailey, "Or, just maybe not. . .They can leave a message."

"Yang, your with Schaffer, Steven with Grey."

"Oh! But Dr. Bailey, I would much rather have rectal exams than. . ." she trailed off as Dr. Bailey glared at her.

"What is wrong with you people today?! Stevens, Grey pit! Yang, Schaffer: tell me what is so wrong with working in the OR with Dr. Schaffer?"

"Oh, nothing, nothing Dr. Bailey. I just. . .I'll go now," she said, running off.

"Yeah, you better! All of you! Get out of my sight, I don't want to see you for the rest of the day!"

"Does-- does that include me, Dr. Bailey?" George questioned, innocently.

"Why are you asking stupid questions, O'malley??"

"Oh. . .right, sorry."

-------------------------------------------------

Cristina entered a patients room, finding Aiden with a teenage boy with his parents. "Dr. Yang, your late." He said, filling out the chart as he proceeded towards the door.

"Yeah, sorry. Bailey had me assigned to pit first and then she--"

"Don't blame this on her," he looked down on her, "This is your fault, not hers. Take responsibility for your actions, Yang."

Her mouth dropped open, unable to even comprehend what was comming out of his mouth; he was usually so conserved and quiet, "What crawled up your ass and died?" She said, laughing to herself as Aiden reached the nurse's station, putting away his chart.

He turned, smiling at her, "Dr. Yang, I'm only going to tell you this once, so pay close attention," figuring that it was going to be some corny threat or saying, she crossed her arm, leaning against the wall next to the patients room, "I have many, many, many patients today."

She smiled at him, "So?"

"I need post-ops for patients in room 2211, 2214, 2231, 2261, 2201, 2234, 2240, 2270," As he began, she quickly pulled out a notepad to write it all down, "2210, 2213, 2235, and 2300," he said, placing them out of order on purpose, "My patient Margaret likes to be called Maggie, so thats what you will call her, if I hear otherwise, I will make your life a living Hell, Jim needs his IV changed, Suzy and Micheal are twins who need rectal and oral exams, Ms. Green, and I repeat, Ms. Green, do not call her Mrs. Jones needs a small amount of food in her system every hour on the hour for the next three hours, no make that four. That in there," He said, pointing to the door that he just left, "That is Corey, call him Corey, thats what he likes, he needs an MRI as well as a CT before noon, which is when we will operate with him."

Cristina smiled, this was the only thing that mad her happy, she would get into a suregery later that day. It was 8 30 right now, and this surgery would save her from the rest of her work. "Unless, of course, you don't finish the work I gave you." He said as he examined another patients chart, "Have a nice day Dr. Yang." He said walking away.

**So, I made Aiden stick up for himself against Cristina! Yay for him!**


	21. City Lights, 21

Meredith sat, watching Aiden's operation. It was about 6 pm; it had lasted over 5 house, and still going. So many complications had been occuring, and she wasn't sure that he would be able to save his patient. She placed an M&M in her mouth as Cristina plopped down next to her. "Oh God, I hate him."

She laughed, putting another one in her mouth, "I know you do, and I love it."

"Oh shut up," She grabbed the bag of candy out of her hands, downing the rest of the goodies.

"Excuse me! I was eating those!"

"Was."

"Oh! Your impossible!" She crossed her arm, leaning back into her chair.

"Hey guys!" Izzie exclaimed, sitting sown on the otherside of Meredith, her hands full of snacks.

"Hey Izz," Meredith said, almost not even turning her head to see her, just reaching over to grab some food.

"I hope he dies on the operating table." Cristina continued, also taking some food from Izzie.

"Cristina!" Izzie scolded.

"What? Would it be so bad for McCreepy to lose a patient every once in awhile?"

"McCreepy?"

"You know what Cristina?" Meredith budded in, "Your just jealous!" She said, waving her arms about for a second.

"Jealous? What could I possibly be jealous of?"

"Who is McCreepy?" Izzie asked, confused.

"You are just sour because you will never be as good of a surgeon as Aiden is!"

"Sour?"

"Yes! Sour. . ." She picked a bag of sour skittles out of Izzies arms and opened it, taking out a green skittle, "Here is you, a sour, envious little beast."

"Ok, so now I'm a skittle?"

"Yes! A skittle you are!"

Izzie only stared at them, dumbfounded, "Dr. Schaffer is McCreepy? Why?"

At this, both Meredith and Cristina stopped their little rant, they had both forgotten that Izzie didn't know about the relationship. Cristina smiled, Izzie was the biggest gossip in the whole hospital, "Oh yeah, McCreepy, thats Meredith's fuck buddy!"

"Cristina!!!" Meredith yelled at her, standing up.

"You and Schaffer did the nasty-nasty?" Izzie exclaimed.

"Izzie!" She yelled at her, luckily they were the only three in the room. She sat down again, next to her, covering Izzie's mouth, "This does not leave this room, understand?" She nodded in agreement, Meredith's hand still cupped on her mouth. "Good." She sat back in he seat right, elbowing Cristina as she laughed. Aiden looked up from his surgery, confused by what had happened. Meredith just smiled at him, hoping that he would ignore it; he did.

"Hey babes," Alex jumped in, sitting in the seat behind Meredith.

"Meredith and Dr. Schaffer are screwing each other!" Izzie told him.

"Izzie!" Meredith yelled, "What did I tell you?"

"We are in the room, are we not? It hasn't left!"

"Wow, Grey!" Alex punched her back lightly, "Is he any good?"

"Shut up, just shut up, I don't have to listen to this!" The entire time Cristina was laughing so hard, she couldn't even speak.

"Is who any good?" George chimed in, carrying snacks as well.

"Schaffer and Grey." ALex pointed at Meredith as he stole some goodies from George.

"Seriously?" He asked, shoving a donut into his mouth.

Meredith just places her head in her hand, mumbling short sentences to herself. Looking up, she saw that the surgery was over; a success. Aiden removed his scrub cap, pointing to the door as he looked at Meredith. "Oooohhhhh, a lovers quarrel!" Cristina stopped to say before she began laughing again.

Meredith just sighed, hitting Cristina upside the head as she left the room.

Meredith ran down to meet Aiden after the surgery, "Hey whats up?" She asked as he scrubbed out. He had his cap off, laying next to the sink; drying off his hand, hekissed her nose lightly before running his fingers through his light broen hair, "Is somthing wrong babe?" Meredith questioned, more worridly.

"No, nothing at all," He smiled, reassuring her, picking up his cap, "I just wanted to see you, thats all."

She cocked her head, stretching her shoulders back and forth, taking in a deep breath, "I think something is up." Her hands were now placed snuggly against her chest, wrinkling her light blue scrubs.

"No," He reassured once more, taking steps closer to her. He placed his hands on her elbows, standing close to her. Leaning down, he put his nose on hers, "I was just thinking about last night." She smiled, remembering what happened all too well.

"That was fun wasn't it?" She took her small arm and wrapped them around his neck, pulling him closer as he nodded.

"It was." He confirmed, "I was just thinking how much I would love to do it again. Are you staying late tonight?"

"Just waiting on you!" Her warm body was still close to his. "Good." he whispered, grabbing her bottom lip with his own. They stayed in that spot for quite some time, allowing each other to deepen or lighten the kiss as they wished, which Meredith did many times to laugh. "Whats so funny?" He questioned, finally pulling away from her.

"Nothing, your just so cute." She said, giving him eskimo kisses. He laughed at her childish antics, pulling her up close so that her toes barely touched the ground.

"I think I love you, Meredith." The conersation suddenly took a serious turn once Aiden let this out. He lowered her to the ground every second that she didn't reply; soon, her feet were fully on the ground. She wasn't quite sure that she was ready to say it, not that she was still in love with Derek, more of she was afraid to be broken again. She looked up into his eyes, as tears began to form. Her cheeks were glowing red, and her voice was clearly cracking, "Aiden, don't hurt me, ok?" He was taken aback by her response, his eyes filled with sorrow and remorse.

"I never will, I promise," He said, taking her into his arms, holding her tightly as he kissed the top of her head.

"Thank you," She whispered.

--------------------------------------------------------------

The other four interns were now leaving the hospital together, laughing about who knows what. They were planning on heading across the street for some well needed drinks. Their hysterical laughter would cause anyone to think that they were already drunk, but tonight, tonight they were just having fun. Their fun was immediately interrupted by a ringing cell phone. "Whoohooo, thats me!" Izzie said enthusiasticaly as she giggled with the rest. Looking down at the ID, her laughing stopped abruptly, "Oh, sorry guys, I gotta go."

"What? What, no!!! You gotta come with us down to Joe's Izz, baby!" Alex shouted to her as they walked away.

"I'll try to meet you guys there, how about that?"

"Alright baby doll! See you then!" They continued their trot to Joe's without her.

"Hello?" Izzie asked as she picked up the phone.

"Izz, why didn't you pick up earlier?"

"Maybe because I was tired of your self pity and moping!" She exclaimed.

"Well, I'm sorry, but we need to talk."

**Its almost here! I decided to shorten it up a bit, and soon, all will be revealed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**


	22. City Lights, 22

"Hello?" Izzie asked as she picked up the phone.

"Izz, why didn't you pick up earlier?"

"Maybe because I was tired of your self pity and moping!" She exclaimed.

"Well, I'm sorry, but we need to talk."

Izzie sighs, smiling, although she knows that he cannot see her, "What do you need Derek?"

"Pick me up at the airport."

"Pick you up, when?"

"Next Saturday, a week from tomorrow."

"And you want to win her back?"

"Well, Richard, the chief called me. He has a patient that is very important to him that just checked it, and apparently, his neurosurgeon isn't good enough." He laughed.

"Mc Creepy!!!" Izzie screamed, jumping up and down as a crowd of people began to look at her. She made her way to her car as she talked to her best friend.

"What??" He said, laughing even harder.

"McCreepy, Dr. Schaffer, Aiden. Those are all of his alias'." Izzie said happily.

"And he is. . .?"

"Merediths boyfriend," she replied, this time more seriously and depressed. There was a long silence on the other side of the phone. Izzie sighed deeply, "You know, you had better hurry Derek. Things look like they are getting pretty serious."

"What do you mean?" His voice was now quiet and sorrowful, rather than spunk as it had just been.

"I mean, they have been with each other for a long tim, and now they're screwing!!"

"What?? Then why is he Creepy Man or whatever?"

"Mc, McCreepy. Because Meredith's best friend and her boyfriend don't like him, so they gave him the name." He was silent once more, this time thinkign about how he could possibly even see Meredith again without her running back to her presious Creepy, or CreepyBoy --man, whatever he is. "Just hurry up and get your ass down here." She said before hanging up.

--------------------------------------------

The next day, Meredith made it to work on time, in fact, earlier than usual. She was sure that she was the first one, but upon entering the locker room, she was proven wrong. Izzie was sitting there, already fuly dressed; her back was turned to the door, and she slouched over the bench that she was straddling. Meredith quietly made her way to her locker, watching as Izzie drew pictures with her fingers on the bench.

"Yes, I told you already, Saturday is fine." She heard Izzie say to the mystery man. "Yes i'm sure. . .You know what? If you keep bugging me about it, it's not happening at all" With this, she looked up to see Meredith smling at her and she opened her locker, "I gotta go." She said before hanging up quickly.

"Izzie's in loooove," she taunted, taking out her scrubs.

"I am not!" She fired back, hopefully Meredith didn't think that she was in love with the man on the other line; that would be way off, considering he was after Meredith.

"You are so," she said, shaking her head, undressing, "I know that little move, you know the drawing pictures with your finger? I user to do that all the time, like I said, its love!"

"Used to?" Izzie questioned, standing up.

"What?"

"You said used to. Your not in love with Aiden?"

"Wh-what are you talking about Izz? We are talkign about you being in love, not me."

"But, you said used to, so that means that you were in love with someone, but you arent anymore? Thant means that you do not love Aiden."

"Look, Izzie," Meredith said, angrier than she expected as she closed her locker, now fully dressed, "It's just. . .things are just difficult, ok?"

"Did you two get in a fight?"

"What?"

"A fight. You are early today, you're never early, did you two fight last night?"

". . .No. . ." Meredith looked at her suspiciously, "Why so curious?"

"Just trying to help a friend Mer, not that you treat me like one." She said, barging out of the room. Meredith just stood there, in shock of what Izzie had done and said.

-------------------------------------

Later that day at lunch, Meredith took a seat next to Cristina, "My gosh Meredith, if I have to spend one more second with lover boy, I am going to hurl." Cristina spurted out the second that Meredith took a seat, slightly laughing. "No, I'm serious Mer, he's after me, do something about it!"

"What? What do you expect me to do?" She laughed, raising her hands into the air and dropping them, "You said he has no balls, he's pissed off; no matter what I say, he's not going to stop."

Cristina let out a deep sigh, leaning back into her seat, "I can't believe that he is still mad at me for that, all I said was that he had no balls!"

"I'd never talk to you again, or prove you wrong." Alex said, sitting down, "Want me to prove you wrong, Yang?"

"Discusting, evil spawn, we weren't even talking about you, although you aren't much better than he is."

"Than who is?" Izzie and Georgi sat down at the table, "Hey guys, I need someone to fill in for me Saturday, can one of you do it?" Izzie asked. They all stopped what they were doing, and looked at her, "What? I gotta pick someone up from the airport!"

"Boyfriend." Meredith chimed in.

"Boyfriend, what boyfriend, you had a boyfriend and didn't tell me?" Cristina questioned.

"He is not my boyfriend! He is a guy who is a friend of mine."

"She is so in love with him," Meredith continued, putting a bite of salad in her mouth, wrinkling her nose to show how discusting it was, before throwing it away.

"I am not, look, can you just fill in for me?"

"Well, is he hot?" Cristina leaned across the table.

"Yes, do tell," Meredith said, leaning back into her chair as she placed her feet on the table.

"I think he's more Meredith's type." Izzie said as-a-matter-of-factly, smiling to herself.

"What creepy and and ass?" Cristina said, following Meredith's example.

"That is not my type," Meredithj argued.

"Oh it so is, stop complaining."

Meredith stuck her tongue out childishly at Cristina, "Hello? Filling in for me?" As she finished her sentence, Izzie's phone began to ring.

"And here is loverboy now!" Meredith said, sarcastically happy.

She gave Meredith a face, picking up the phone, "Hello? Yeah. . .Your what??? Seriously?" She was now standing up, "Where? That is so awesome! Yeah, i'll call you back after work!" She hung up, sprinting away towards the hospital.

"What was that all about?" Meredith asked Cristina.

"No Idea."


	23. City Lights, 23

**Aiden belongs to me, while all other GA characters belong to Shonda Rhimes, but we all know that, right? ;)**

Meredith got home early, being greeted by wonderful smells that filled the air. Walkig into the kitchen, she smiled seeing Aiden cooking away, "I didn't know you cooked." She greeted him, entering the kitchen, giving him a small kiss.

"Tonight I do!" He smiled, kissing her back before getting back to what he was doing.

"So," she leaned agains the counter, "Whats the occasion? Should I go slip into something else?"

"Hah, sorry to dissapoint you Mer, but we are having a guest tonight, so no see through lingerie or undies!" He laughed, "But go ahead and change, make yourself comfy."

"Oh," Meredith said dissapointingly an embarassed, "Ok then, I'm gonna go put on some sweats."

"Alright babe, hurry."

As he continued cooking, Meredith made her way upstairs. She browsed through her drawers, looking for something nice, but cozy at the same time. But, she coudlnt find anything other than ratty old shirst with holes in them and sexy see through lingerie. Sighing, she made her way into the bathroom to fix herself up; afterall, she didnt even know who was coming. She added a bit of make-up and curled her hair, putting on nice, heeled shoes. As she made her way downstairs, the doorbell rang, and she saw Aiden rush to the door, throwing off the apron and cookign mit that he was just wearing. She was to the bottom step before he swung the door open, revealing an all too familiar face. The smile that she wore suddenly dissapeared as she saw him standing in the door. Her breath was taken away as she saw him go through the same faze. Reacting before he could, she rushed to the door, shutting it tightly, locking it.

"Meredith, what was that for???"

All she could do was slide down against the door. Letting out a heavy sigh, she placed her head in her hands, "Meredith. . ."

"No!" She stood up, "Just no! Do not let him in! I don't know who pulled this stupid prank," Her voice was raising, Derek now being able to hear her from the other side of the door, "And frnkly, I don't care, but you will NOT let _him_ into MY house, are we clear?"

"But, but Mer, " He began, being cut off by her again.

"No! I dont want to hear it!! It is over if you let him in, ok?? Thats how serious it is, OVER. PERIOD. Do not Ever let him into this house." She stormed into her bedroom, slamming the door shut. Aiden had no clue what was going on, but obviously they had a past together. Aiden opened the door to talk to Derek and appologize, afterall, she said that he couldnt come in, not that he couldnt talk to him, but when he opened the door, Derek as well as his car was gone. Aiden didnt understand, he thought he would be doing her a favor -- he saw her at least once a week researching him, looking up everythng on him, there was no reason that she should be reacting in this way. Convinced that he was right, he made his way up to her room. Opening the door, he found her laying on her back the floor, staring intently at the ceiling.

"Meredith."

"I would rather not right now, Aiden," She said, rather softly.

Sighing, he took another step toward her, "Alright Meredith, here it goes: I don't care. I want to hear it. . . .You just, you just need to tell me if this is going to work out. If you don't tell me, it's over.This is how serious it is, over. Period." She looked at him, he held a stern front; Meredith thought she knew that he would never do that to her, but she sure as Hell wasn't going to take the chance. Without saying a word, she got up, pushing past him and heading down the hall. Reaching the attic, she pulled down the stairs and headed up quickly. He was confused; Aiden really was dumbfounded in fact, he had absolutely no clue what she was up to. Suddenly, a large red suit case hit the floor in front of him, causing him to jump and scream. "What was that for?" He yelled up at her as she emerged from the attic. Still, without a word, she pushed the ladder back up, draging the large pack behind her on the small wheels into her room. He followed closely behind her. Carelessly tossing the bag onto the floor, she turned to him, "Sit." She commanded as she searched through her drawers. He did, watching as she pulled a razor knife out of her small drawer, cutting open the old, dusty ducktape. Throwing open the top, she revealed dozens upon dozes of photographs piled on top of each other. She sat down next to him, his mouth hanging open in awe as he picked up only a few of the many pictures.

"There, happy?"

**Lalala, here is an update!!!**


	24. City Lights, 24

Aiden browsed through the pictures; in every single picture that he saw Meredith looked ten times happier than he had ever seen her in their relationship. He was shocked how many pictures she had kept of the two, all arranged in chronological order. He had always heard that Dr. Shepherd was supposed to be a nice guy, and easy to get along with, but nothing like this. There was just too many to go through; he threw what he had down, back onto the suit case.

"Im sorry," she whispered.

"Oh Mer, no, no its not your fault," he took her into his arms, running his fingers through her hair as she kept her head burried into his chest, "Its mine, I'm sorry."

She shot up instantly, confused, "Your fault?"

Sighing he decided that he should elaborate, "When Cristina and Burke came the other day, I saw you searching for him on the web. I figured that you wanted to meet him, I mean, he's a great surgeon. And I went to see Dr. Webber and he told me that he was going to be there for awhile --"

"Richard said that Derek is staying?" Meredith blurted out, shocked and startled, unable to think.

"Yeah," he said, letting out a deep breath, "His niece has a tumor, and he wants Derek to get rid of it."

"But, why--why couldn't you do it?" She threw her head back into his chest.

Laughing at her 'silly antics' he brushed through her hair once more, "He wants the best, Mer."

"Well. . .your close enough to the best. . ."

"Not close enough for him apparently. You have nothing to worry about, darling, I'm here for you."

-------------------------------------

Derek pulled into Izzie's driveway, acing back and forth several times before heading towards the door. Izzie was leaning against the doorframe, watching him patiently, "Rough night?"

"You? You just--How could you arrange that??" He spurted out, "How could you do that to me Izz!"

"I was just helping!" She urged as she pulled him inside before it started to rain. "Look, you needed to see her before you started working tomorrow, so that you could focus!"

He sighed, pulling his old friend into his arms, "Thanks Izz, its just not what I need right now." He pulled her away, cocking his head, "She hates me."

"Oh no she doesn't! I know, I spend everyday with her Derek!" He didn't seem to convinced, "She was just suprised to see you, thats all." She reassured him, rubbing his shoulder.

"Sure?"

"I am absolutely positive!"

"You promise?"

"I do!"

"Pinky." He reached out his pinky finger to her and she grabbed it with hers, "Pinky." she repeated, smiling.


	25. City Lights, 25

**Ok, another update! Aiden belongs to me, the GA characters belong to Shonda, as always**

The next day, Meredith had seen Derek all day at the hospital, but had luckily only exchanged small glances every once in awhile. He was the last person she wanted to see. It was now late, and Meredith roamed, somewhat aimlessly through the halls of Seattle Grace Hospital. Most of her patients had been released today, or were long past asleep in their beds. She was on-call tonight, which scared her: It gave her a higher chance to see the man that she dreaded to meet once more. She wasn't sure what kind of feelings would stir back up if she looked him in the eyes, like she had done so many times only a year ago. Her hands were shoved deep inside of her white lab coat, she was looking at her feet as she walked slowly, too many thoughts racing through her mind to grasp just one of them.As a small voice came from behind her, she froze for only a split second, "Meredith?" It was soft, kind, pleading, and forgiving all at once. Here it was, she would either stand there, frozen, or she could run. Run as fast as she could away from her troubles, away from her fears, and back into her cowardice self. She decided that it would only be rigt to face him, after all, she would have to sooner or later. His footsteps grew louder, he came closer. Meredith tried so hard to stay put, her back still to him, but could hold out no longer. She ran. She wan't sure where she was going, but she needed to get away from him. "Meredith!" He yelled after her, chasing her down. Hearing his footsteps follow almost brought tears to her eyes. It had felt exactly the same as when she had found Derek in bed with Addison. She was running, away from everything, and he was chasing her, pleading to turn around and come back, pretending as though he cared. In one swift movement, as he caught up to her, he grabbed her arm about her elbow, and pulled her into the nearest on-call room, which just happened to be right next to them, across from a nurses station. "Meredith," he pleaded as he closed the door, now grasping both of her elbows with either one of his hands. She only shook her head to him, her eyes closed, trying as hard as she could not to look into his eyes, and did not want to release every pent up emotion in her body, "Meredith," his soft, caring voice cooed once more, "Please, Mer, just list-"

"No! I'm not going to listen, I'm not going to look at you! I don't want to, I just want you to leave me alone! And don't call me Mer, you have no right to anymore!" She exclaimed, almost angrily, her eyes still closed, he head still shaking back and forth softly.

"Meredith," was his soft, comforting reply.

"No. Stop, stop talking to me, and stop calling me Meredith, stop being here! I'm happy, and I don't want you here, and I don't want you to screw me over again, and stop looking at me! Your looking at me!"

"Meredith, please," Derek pleaded, still 'looking' at her, "Just hear me out, I am not here to hurt you, I am not here to win you back, I am just here for Dr. Webber, he asked me to come. And I don't expect you to want to talk to me, and I don't expect you to like me, Meredith, but I am here, and I am going to be here for awhile, so I just want to say I'm sorry. I know, I know, that doesn't make anything right. I did you wrong, and I regret it everyday of my life. But, the fact is that our fates are intertwined. We may not be soulmates, but we are meant to be near each other, whether we be as lovers, friends, or enemies, we are meant to be together. One way or another, we will always be together," and with that, he loosened his grip on Meredith's arm, giving her freedom.

Meredith's eyes were now open, her head now looking down at the ground. It took everything that she had not to drop to the floor, and start bawling at his feet. She could still feel his eyes on her, burning a hole through her heart -- she was wrong, Derek Shepherd had yet to return her heart, he had been keeping it all to himself for a whole year. Now, he was trying to return it, but she could not bring it to herself to take it back. Without another word, without a single glance, Meredith rushed out of the on-call room, shutting the door behind her as she left. Derek leaned back against the wall, sliding onto the floor. He didn't know what to do now, he couldn't do anything without his Meredith.

Upon exiting the on-call room, Meredith saw Aiden standing at the nurses station, leaning against the desk, apparently filling out a patients chart. She quickly rushed over to him, placing herself between the desk and Aiden, forcing him to stand straight up. Burying her face into his chest, she took in his smell, the smell that she had become accostomed to for the past year. He didn't say anything, but instead, placed his hand on her head, stroking her hair. "Hide me," she mumbled into his chest.

"What?" He chucked slightly at what Meredith had asked him to do.

"Hide me!" She replied, seriously as she lifted her head out of his chest, looking into his eyes to make sure that he heard her correctly. He didn't question her, but het his white coat swoop forward, placing a barrier around either side of her. "I saw him," she mumbled again, placing her head back into his chest as she clentched his dark blue scrubs in her hand. "I tried to avoid him, but he found me Aiden, he found me." He could tell that she was getting upset.

"Shhh," He calmed her, placing his lips on the top of her head, "It's ok."

"Request me." She stated, "Request me everyday, all day, first thing in the morning. I don't care if I'm doing surgeries all day, or post-ops, just request me."

"Ok," he whispered softly into her hair, "I will, I will." He knew that she didn't want to spend anytime with Derek, and he would try as hard as he could to keep her away from him, if thats what she wanted. He loved her, and would do anything for her. As he finished his sentence, Derek emerged from the on-call room. Meredith heard this, and tensed up. Aiden knew that it was Derek, even though his back was turned, meerly from Meredith's response. Clearly her plan had worked; Derek looked in either direction quickly, presumably for Meredith, before darting one way down the hall. A few silent moment passed as Aiden finished filling out his chart, Meredith still between him and the desk, but he was able to see over her and continue his work. "Are you on call tonight?" He asked, after he was sure that Derek was long gone, clicking, and retracting his pen before putting it in the pocket of his coat. He pulled back from her, only enough to lift her face and look into her eyes with a 'McDreamy' smile of his own.

"Yes," She said, quietly, her eyes a little red and watery from her tear threat.

"Good," He said, still smiling at her, "We can go take a nap together then." She only smiled before leaning into his chest, allowing him to lead the both of them back into the on-call room that her and Derek had just left.


	26. City Lights, 26

**Ok, another update! Sorry it took so long, my internet went dead for a couple of days. The song is 'Fallin' by alicia keys, i think ;  
Enjoy! Aiden belongs to me, the rest to Shonda Rhimes**

Derek searched frantically for Meredith, but to no avail. He finally gave up, figuring that she had gone home. He would surely catch her tomorrow, somewhere where she couldn't escape him, somewhere like the elevator. Because he was on call, he decided that he should try to get some rest. He opened the door to the on-call room that he an Meredith left not more than an hour ago. And, to his surprise, there she was, laying perfectly in another man's arms. Aiden's arm was wrapped smugly around her small frame, as Meredith's face was buried into his chest. He is devastated; finally when he thinks he might be able to make it up to her, and try to do something right, he is struck down with a blow like this. He suddenly realized how in love he actually was with her, and, seeing her happy put him at rest. He wouldn't ruin this, he wouldn't ruin her life for his own selfish reasons, it just wouldn't be right. Letting out a deep breath filled with sorrow and regret, he stepped out of the room, closing the door quietly so that he wouldn't wake Meredith.

_I keep on fallin' in  
And out of love with you  
Sometimes I love you  
Sometimes you make me blue  
Sometimes I feel good  
At times I feel used  
Loving you darling  
Makes me so confused_

As he exited the room, Derek's pager went off signaling a 911. He also heard Meredith's and Aiden's pagers, and then shuffling within the on call room. He stopped, looking back as Meredith launched out of the room. She stopped dead in her tracks as Derek stared at her, his eyes filled with sorrow and remorse. Aiden followed quickly after her, practically running into Meredith's stopped body. He looked up, realizing why Meredith was frozen. He glared at Derek, taking Meredith by the arm and leading her around him. He only stood there, his back now facing the two as they ran off. She couldn't help but look behind her to see Derek's response to what had just happened; she remembered when she visited the hospital to see Derek, they would sneek into a nearby on call room and make love before he had to rush off. Meredith couldn't help but wonder if Derek had thought thats what her and Aiden where doing, and frankly, she didn't want him to.

When they arrived in the pitt, there was many people being wheeled into the hospital, most of them in critical condition. Aiden kissed Meredith on the head quickly, "I have to go," he explained; she nodded in response as he ran off. Bailey entered the scene, screaming orders to evryone there, although at the time Meredith was the only intern present.

_I keep on fallin' in and out of love with you  
I never loved someone the way that I love you_

"Grey, your with Dr. Shephard, go!" She exclaimed, not even waiting for a response as she turned around when the other interns entered. She didn't really have the time, or the guts to stand up, so she ran to OR3 where Derek was scrubbing in. She stopped when she saw him; she really needed to stop doing that. He looked up from the sink, staring softly into her eyes. He cocked his head, but in a different way than Aiden always did; this made her heart melt, her stomach drop, and her knees weak, but she couldn't help it; Derek had always done that for her.

_Oh oh oh I never felt this way  
How do you give me so much pleasure  
And cause me so much pain  
Just when I think  
I've taken more than would a fool  
I start fallin'  
Back in love with you_

She snapped out of it quickly, rushing next to him to wash her hands thoroughly. Placing his hands at the edge of the sink, he leaned into it as he watched her hands intently. She watched her hands as well, knowing perfectly well that his eyes were on her. After completely cleaning them, she decided to do it again, washing her hands roughly. Derek stood up straight, walking toward her until his chest was leaning slightly on her shoulder. At this point, she began to scrub harder and harder because she was nervous. He took in her familiar scent, smiling as he did so, placing one hand on the both of hers, "Not so rough," he whispered softly into her ear, "They are clean, I promise."

She turned around swiftly, meeting him face to face for the first time in a year. His smile calmed her, and she realized why she had been with him for so long. It took every fiber in her body not to throw her arms around him and cry, apologizing for leaving and not trying to make it work. She wanted to kiss him all over, and he do the same for her, but she knew she couldn't. He let a small chuckle escape his lips, placing a stray bundle of hair behind her ear, "Just as beautiful as ever," he intended to say more to himself, but noticed that he forced Meredith's blood to rush to her face, causing her to blush.

_I keep on fallin' in and out of love with you  
I never loved someone the way that I love you_

They entered the surgery, Derek flirting with Meredith the entire time; more with his eyes than his words. It was long and hard, but it ended as a sucsess. As everything was being finished and sewed up, Meredith saw Derek look up to the observing room; she noticed a smile under his mask as he threw his hands in the air. Looking up, she saw none other than Preston standing there, smiling back down at the two. They both left the room to scrub out, Derek still wearing a goofy smile. Nervously, Meredith looked from her hands to Dere, "You know Preston?" She asked quietly, almost nonchalantly.

His smile carried over to his glances at Meredith; he was overly ecstatic that she had said anything even remotly nice to him; or rather, not mean to him. He leaned over, nudging her with his shoulder, causing her to giggle, "Yeah, do you?" She only turned to smile at him as he handed her paper tawels to dry her hands off.


	27. City Lights, 27

Upon arriving home, Aiden found the house a complete wreck, clothes around the house, baking galore in the kitchen, with every light in the house on. Hearing a loud thunk, he made his way upstairs to Meredith's room. Opening the door only a crack, he saw Meredith's back; she was bending down, searching through her closet, throwing numerous things behind her and onto the bed, or surrounding area. "Mere?"

Quicky shooting up, she turned around glancing at her confused boyfriend, "Aiden! Your home so early!"

Cocking his head, he took a few steps into the room, "Yeah, is that a bad thing?"

She suddenly realized that it sounded as though she didn't want him home, "Oh, no no no!" She smiled, walking over to him and placing her arms around his neck, kissing him lightly on the lips.

"And. . .what exactly are you doing?" He asked, kissing her on the nose.

"Cleaning!"

Looking around, he sawbags of who knows what lined against the wall, the bed was a mess, the floor was filled with clothes and pictures; he even saw her panties hanging on the light, ". . .Cleaning?"

"Well, yeah! See, I have to clean out everything I have, and throw it away."

"Ok, Mere, your confusing me," He said, smiling.

Taking a deep sigh in, she began, "I am letting go."

"Letting go?"

"Yes, letting go."

". . .Of?"

"Derek."

"Derek?"

"Yes. Derek."

"Ah, I see," his smile grew wider.

"Everything I have reminds me of him, so I am giving it all to good will! Except for the pictures. . ." she went into thought, "I don't think they would want the pictures, but the fireplace might!"

"You want to burn all of your pictures of Derek?" He said.

"Yes! I do, it will help. A lot."

"Alright, alright, whatever you say, babe. I just think you might regret it."

"Regret it??? How could I. I am simply letting go of my past, and moving onto my future!" She said placing her arms on her hips as she cocked her head.

"Ok, ok. I trust you Mere, don't worry. I'll do whatever you want."

"Well then, pick up those three bags, and bring them downstairs. It's cold anyways." She said as she sweeped past him to head downstairs.

"You want to do it now?" He questioned, turning to meet her.

"The sooner the better!" She continued as she walked down the stairs.

When Aiden arrived downstairs, he saw that Meredith had already started the fire. She was prodding the wood in the fireplace, causing the flames to grow at her. He placed the three bags down loudly, trying to make sure that she knew he was there. "Alright." She said softly to the fire. She sttod up straight putting the poker in its rightful place and turning to Aiden.

"Are you sure you want to do this? Memories are not a bad thig to have Mere, you can still move on with memories."

"No, no, no. This is what is best, Aiden baby, just. . .trust me, I know what I need to do."

"Alright, I do."

She pulled one of the bags to the couch where she ripped it open, causing some pictures to scatter across the floor. She picked up one of the pictures of her and Derek. It was the time that he took her to Paris for a suprise twentieth birthday gift. They were standing in fron of the Eifel Tower; it was a cold day and the two were bundled up together with coats and scarfs. He was standidn behind her with his arms around her waist, his head resting on her shoulder. She smiled, remembering the great time they had, "Maybe. . .maybe I'll just keep this one."

He nodded in agreement and understanding, "Ok." He said softly, "I think that thats a good idea," came his sincere thought.

"Yeah, ok." She said, setting it on the table.

"What about this one?" He asked holding one up. It was the time that they had traveled together to Egypt, the great pyramids. Meredith had always been fascinated by them, and so, on their second year together, he took her to Egypt for Christmas. The picture held the both of them, riding on separate camels in the desert, but leaning in between to share a quick kiss. She smiled again, "Maybe just this one too." She said, putting it on the table with the other. Going through the others in the bag quickly, she let herself collapse on the couch, tears in her eyes.

"Mere, Mere its ok," he tried soothing her before she got too far; but he was too late, Meredith broke out into sobs as he took her into his arms.

"I ju- I just , I just can't!" She choked out inbetween tears.

"Mere, It's ok baby. Sometimes it's hard to let go, and you just need to take your time ok? Sometimes old feelings come up, and you just need to face them. You just need time, thats all. When your ready to make a decision, you'll know, and right now, right now, your just not. Your not ready to let him go, and thats ok. You just need to take your time." He said, kissing her sweetly on the top of her head. Her cries died down as they both stared into the large fire, where they stayed all night.


	28. City Lights, 28

**The Fray--"Fall Away"  
Aiden belongs to me, the rest of the characters belong to Shonda Rhimes, just a reminder ;)**

_You swear you recall nothing at all  
That could make you come back down  
You made up your mind to leave it all behind  
Now you're forced to fight it out_

It was a brisk morning, and the sun had yet to rise over Seattle. The foreboding sky sent chills down Meredith's spine as she quickly threw on her white coat. Straightening out her collar, she couldn't help but feel that something was going to go terribly wrong that day. The heater had already broke in the house in the middle of the night, and barely anyone in the city had electricity due to the large storm that was still raging on, even now. Meredith couldn't help but let out a deep sigh, remembering her old days that she spent with Derek in New York. Because Meredith had practically a phobia of these storms, no matter where Derek was that day, he would come rushing home if one began to hold her all night; to 'ensure her safety'. A smiled played on her face, looking out the window, she could'y help but wonder what he was doing right now, and if he had thought about her during these terrible storms.

Meredith continued to get dressed, now leaving her room and heading down the stairs. Candles lighted the way, due to the lack of light throughout the house. Entering the kitchen, she saw Aiden reading the newspaper at the counter, sipping his coffee. Looking up, he smiled sweetly at her, "I got you some coffee," He said, pointing at another mug on the table, "I had to run out to get it this morning, still no power. She only nodded in response, taking up the warm drink into her hands, letting the steam heat her face. "Did you sleep well?" He asked as he looked back down at the paper.

"I've had better." She said, looking around the kitchen briefly.

"Is it Derek?" He lifted his head, cocking it as he layed down the paper.

"Derek? What? Oh, no no. It was the storm."

"The storm?" He laughed lightly, "What about the storm?"

At the moment, she really didn't feel like explaining her whole situation; how her little phobia started, how she can't help but be terrified everytime lightning strikes. . .how Derek would hold her all night long, whispering comforting, sweet words into her ear, "Nothing," she said lightly, her head now facing the ground, staring as in deep thought.

"Are you ok, baby?"

"Huh?" She said, her head shooting up from the ground, "Yeah, I'm great."

"Are you sure Mere?" He asked, now almost worried.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. Let's get going, we'll be late for work."

_You fall away from your past  
But it's following you  
You fall away from your past  
But it's following you_

Upon arriving to work, Meredith practically full out sprinted all the way to the lockers. Aiden had barely even gotten out of the car before he realised that she had already reached the doors to the hospital. He only shok his head in confusement as he continued inside. When finally reaching the lockers, Meredith slowed down, now only at a brisk walk to her own personal locker. Cristina gave her a look, raising her eyebrow. She was always early, and was wondering why Meredith was in such a hurry to get in when they had plently of time. Pulling off her shirt, Cristina looked at Meredith more closely as she ripped open her locker, all of her belonging falling to the ground, "What's your problem today Meredith?"

"What?" She asked, shooting up from the floor where she had been picking up her scrubs, "Nothing, nothing is wrong." The truth was, everythig was wrong. The man she was in love with for eight years slept with Addison, the woman who was basically her sister; she ran away from them both, hoping to completely leave the two behind, but her past had cought up with her, and a lot quicker than she had expected. And now, now it was pouring rain outside with thunder and lightining, Meredith's worst fear of all time. Nothing was right, everything was completely wrong.

"Oh, that is total bull Mere," She said, shaking her head, "I can so see that look in your eyes."

"What?" She questioned as she threw on her blue scrub top over her red shirt, "What are you takling about? What look?"

"Your thinking of McDreamy."

"McDreamy?? Who the Hell is that?"

"Oh puh-lease Meredith, yo know exactly who that is." She slammed her locker shut, now heading towards the door, "Shephard! You know te guy your are still completely head over heels for!"

"What? I am not head over heels for him!" She yelled as she ran after Cristina out the door.

_You left something undone, it's now your rerun  
It's the one you can't erase  
You should have made it right, so you wouldn't have to fight  
To put a smile back on your face_

"Alright you four!" Bailey yelled at them, only about a half hour after Cristina's and Meredith's little arguement, "It's pouring outside, and you know what that means? We're gonna get a lot of idiots in here today who can't learn to slow down! Dr. Burke already has one of them, Karev, you go." Alex slimed, looking at the rest of them, "Have fun," He said before running off.

Bailey just shook her head at his childness, "The three of you, pitt with me, aren't you excited? Now get moving!" She said as they all began to leave.

"Dr. Bailey," A nurse, Olivia stopped her as she grabbed her shoulder, "Dr. Shephard needs an intern in OR2, he claims that it's an emergency."

At this, all the interns stopped, turning around to see who Bailey would call on. Meredith really didn't want to be in surgery with him right now, but she also didn't want to be outside, waiting in the rain and thunder, for the ambulances to arrive; this she thought would be better than that. "Grey. Shephard, OR2, go!"

She nods her head quickly as the other two inters begin to mope. Rushing towards the OR, she turns the corner, sliding straight into a hard chest. Taken aback, she slips backward, but is cought in the nick of time by the man, "Mere," he smiled, laughing a little, "Slow down, your going to hurt yourself!"

She finds herself in Derek's arm. He lifts her up, trying not to spill the coffee that he held in the other hand. She is speachless, cursing at herself in her mind for not slowing down and paying attention to where she was going. SHe stands up straight, forcing hersle fout of his tight grasp, "I though you were in surgery."

"Oh," he said, giving her his 'McDreamy' smile, "Are you my intern?"

"I am."

"Are you doing ok today?" He asked, cocking his head as he leaned against the wall.

"I am fine, why aren't you in surgery?"

"Are you sure Merbear?" She shivered slightly when he mentioned her old nickname, "It's storming pretty hard outside in case you didn't notice."

"I did notice." She began, "And the surgery?"

"You must be terrified, it's a good thing you have work to occupy you today," he said worried as he rubbed her shoulder with care.

"Ok, Dr. Shephard, I am fine, trust me, I am a big girl, and I can handle myself. Are we going into the OR or not, because if not, I'll have to head down to the pitt." She said, trying to sound frusterated.

"Oh, Mere! Don't do that, you'll be right next to the storm then! It's too much for you down there." He said sincerely.

"I am not a child!" She said before truging off into the opposite dirrection.

"The surgery starts in 15!" He called out, forcing her to stop.

_And you fall away from your past  
But It's following you  
You fall away from your past  
But It's following you  
You fall away from your past  
But It's following you  
You fall away from your past  
But It's following you_


	29. City Lights, 29

_This has not been easy  
this has been hard  
I am scarred  
and I do not know what to do with you_

At the end of the day, Meredith waited outside on the bench. The storm hadn't fully come to a halt, but had calmed down quite a bit. Rain, and an occasional bolt of lightin was all that remained. She hated this; if she stayed inside she was bound to run back into Derek, which at this point she thought would be the absolute worst thing in the world, considering their earlier encounter and proceedure together. If she stayed outside, she would be stuck in the terrible storm. She wished so badly that she and Aiden had taken seperate cars now, but it was too late; he had the keys, and there was no way to get home unless she wanted to walk, which wasn't going to happen. Meredith was confused and lost; she had so many feelings rushing through her body -- ones of hate, love, lust, and regret. Sometimes she wished that she would have just stayed with Derek, to keep trying, and get passed what happened. The other half of her was glad that she ditched him, afterall, he did cheat on her, and that was just not acceptable. Leaning back on the bench, she sighed deeply, letting her head fal backwards. She instantly met with his face, causing her to practically jump out of her seat and land on the floor.

_go inside, kiss your mouth with my lips  
grab your hips, cant remember why i fell in love with this_.

He cocked his head, a worried look on his face, "Mere, why are you outside? Have you really gotten over your fear?"

Suprised by his presence, she quickly made herself presentable by slidding the wrinkles out of her shirt, standing up straight, "That's none of your buisness for one, for two, no I haven't, and for three, whay are you even talking to me? I hate you rememeber?? Remember, you slept with Addison, chased after me, I left, planning on never seeing you again, I met Aiden, and now we are happy, then you showed up to screw everything up?"

"Thats not how I remember it." He said softly.

"Oh really? You see it differently?" She almost yelled at him. A long silenced came next, making Meredith uncomfortable, "Well then, why don't you just tell me how you see it? I'm probably gonna hear it soon anyways!" His worried look dissapeared as his facial expression dropped into a frown. He looked at the floor, one hand in his pocket, the other holding his briefcase, "Well?" She inquired.

"Mer-" He began, cutting himself off as he looked around quickly, trying to think of what to say. He was trying at this point to hold back the tears that were stinging his eyes, "Mere, ju- I'ts just," he stopped again, turning his head to look down at the floor once again. By this time her expression of anger had softened, he was trying so hard, but it was too much, "What I was going to say. . .Well, all that I can say is that I can't make up anymore excuses for what I did to you. What I did. . .what I did was just unacceptable, and the absolute worst decision of my life. I can't really explain what happened, and I know that's not good enough, and I know that a simple apology is not good enough, and it never will be. But. . .but i want to make it up to you," His vioce now began to crack as he spoke, "I want to make it up to you," he repeated, now looking up into her eyes,"It will be hard. . .and I know your happy, and I know that. . .I just know." He cleared his throat, trying to maintain his composure, "I know that your happy, but I want to be happy too. Just please, talk to me, love me, let me have one more chance," He took a few steps toward her, placing his warm hand on her cold cheek, "It's a lot to ask, I know," he whispered, "But. . .just one more time. I need you Mere." She was looking directly up at him now, their bodies touching as tears brimmed her eyes. He leaned down, placing his lips gently on top of hers.

_but i miss you, i love you  
its a shame you cant stay away from me this time cause oh no  
you beg me you ask me to kiss you and hug you  
you wont be getting my affection again cause oh no  
i dont need you tonight_

She stayed only a moment under Derek's kiss, pulling away from him, "No," She whispered, shaking her head as she backed up, tears still brimming her eyes, "No, you don't get another chance Derek. We spent eight years together, EIGHT YEARS! And the day before our anniversary, you screw my best friend who is practically my sister?!?! No! You aren't forgiven, and you never will be! I don't love you anymore, I love Aiden, and thats that!"

"Mere-"

"No! You can't Mere, Merbear me anymore. You lost that right a long time ago. I don't know why you slept with Addison, and frankly, I DON'T CARE!" She said, practically screaming at the top of her lungs.

"Meredith, calm down," He said, taking a step toward her, brushing her elbow. She immediately pulled away from his touch, backing up until the rain was pouring down on her head, "NO! DO NOT TELL ME TO CALM DOWN!" she screamed as tears began to roll down her face. Taking another step forward, Derek was immediately intercepted by a young male doctor that was still dressed in his scrubs.

_Who do you think you are?  
No one cares about a name without a face,  
so dont go shooting up the place  
make no mistake the loves not real  
cause the love that i got is deeper so much deeper than you could ever feel_

"Who the Hell do you think you are?" He yelled at him as he took Meredith into his arms, "It's ok, Mere, everything is ok now. What do you think your doing?" He turned his attention from Meredith back to Derek, letting her go to face him.

"Who are you?" Derek questioned curiously. Ever since he had gotten to Seattle, the only things he heard from the male doctors was 'Meredith, Meredith, Meredith,' and he wasn't quite sure why.

"I am her brother, who are you?" He questioned.

"Meredith doesn't have any brothers," He stated as a matter of factly.

"Well, I am her new found brother. . .Your the one who broke her aren't you?" Derek opened his mouth to speak at Burke's accusation, but stopped. He was right; he broke Meredith. Thats why she fell back on Aide, for support. He silently cursed at himself for everythig that he had done.

"Preston stop!" Meredith intervened, "I can handle this by myself," she said, wiping a solomn tear from her face.

"Meredith. . ." Preston tried to persuade her.

"No, I'm ok. Aiden will be here soon, and we can go home together." She said, trying to calm herself down, "Just go inside Preston, just go. I can handle this, don't worry about me."

"I'm worried." He said, eyeing Derek before his pager went off, "Damn." He muttered, "Meredith I have to go, but if he does anything you don't like, just tell me and I'll beat him to a pulp," He said before kissing her on the forehead and running back into Seattle Grace, glancing back before he entered to see that she was alright.

_it was really nice to know you  
but, theres nothing left to show you  
i got bills to pay get out the way its time to move on  
and even with your boyfriend, will never be the same again  
Discuss me over cigarettes and say to him..._

Meredith looked back at Derek, cocking her head, "I'm sorry. . .I just can't forgive you. Not now. . .not ever Derek. I have to go, goodbye." She began to walk away, not knowing exactly where she was going, she just had to het away from him.

"Meredith," He said quickly and desperately before she passed him, grabbing her arm, "Don't say goodbye. Goodbye means that we will never see each other again." He said, seriously.

She smiled, letting out a small giggle to herself as she remembered everytime that he said that in the past, " I have to go Derek. I have a life to run, to fix. I have to pick up all my pieces, and Aiden is helping me put them back together. I have a house to take care of, a job to do, bills to pay. I've moved on, and now it's time for you to. Honestly, I wish this was goodbye, but sadly, I don't think it is." She said before walking away, leaving Derek alone in front of Seattle Grace Hospital.

_i miss you, i love you  
its a shame you cant stay away from me this time cause oh no  
you beg me you ask me  
to kiss you and hug you  
you wont be getting my affection again  
cause oh no, i dont need you  
and i miss you, i love you  
its a shame you cant stay away from me this time cause oh no  
you beg me, you ask me to  
to kiss you and hug you  
you wont be getting my affection again  
cause oh no, I dont need you tonight_

**"Miss You, Love You" By Maroon 5**


	30. City Lights, 30

**'Here is gone' By the GooGoo Dolls  
All Grey's characters belong to Shonda, Aiden belongs to me!**

_You and I got something  
But it's all then it's nothing to me  
yah  
I got my defenses  
When it comes to your intentions to me  
yah  
And we wake up in the breakdown  
In the things we never thought we could be  
yah_

Meredith went home, thinking of what Derek, thinking of what he said, and most importantly, thinking of what he did. She sighed, letting herself into her house quietly. Dropping her bags to her side and her keys on the small table that was perfectly positioned next to the entry, she slid onto the couch, not bothering to turn the lights on. Her body went limp once she settled in, her mind roaming freely around the fact that after a year of seeing Derek, she still alowed him to kiss her, even if it was just a small one. It would have been different if he had just hugged her, or just touched her, that would have been ok, but no, he had to just go off and press his delicious lips onto hers. Digging her head into her pillow, she let out a muffled scream, trying to get Derek out of her mind. Why couldn't Aiden do these things to her? Why couldn't he make her melt in her arms, shoot her down with one glance, or make her fall in love over and over with the simple touch of his hands? Confusion burst through her head, trying to find an explanation for everything. She thought she was actually falling in love with him until Derek had to pop right up again. A tear escaped her eye when she finally layed down. Taking deep and steady breaths, she lulled herself to sleep with her mother's old lullaby.

_I'm not the one who broke you  
I'm not the one you should fear  
We've got to move you darling  
I thought I lost you somewhere  
But you were never really ever there at all_

Aiden came through the door not too long after she fell into a deep slumber on her mother's couch. His rush to see her came to a slow stop as he saw Meredith's eyes closed on the couch. He smiled to himself, taking in her beauty; as he approached her, her red and puffy cheeks began to stand out. Leaning down to meet her sleeping form face to face, he brushed her hair out of her face, tucking it behind her ear. Then kissing her forehead lightly, he left to retrieve a small blanket for her. Upon returning to the couch, she was awake, staring intently at him.

"Hey babe," He whispered, sitting next to her on the couch, placing another kiss on her forehead, "Are you ok?" He asked, cocking his head.

"Huh? Yeah I'm ok," She said lightly, stretching her arms into the air, "Why do you ask?" She said yawning as she placed her head on his chest.

"Well, one, you look like you've been crying, and two, Preston told me what happened," His voice was lighter at the end of the statement.

"Oh," letting out another deep sigh, she placed her head into his neck, taking in his familiar smell. He wrapped his arms tightly around her, never wanting to let her go.

"Shall we head to bed?" He asked politely, letting his head fall next to hers.

"Yeah, let's go." She said, letting him take her into his arms, carrying her up to her bedroom.

_And I want to get free  
Talk to me  
I can fear you falling  
And I won't tempt to be  
All you need  
Somehow here is gone_

Setting her down in the bed, he pulled the sheets up to meet her face, trying to tuck her in as much as possible before he was forced to leave her side. "Do you want to change?" She just shook her head no in response, looking at his beautiful green eyes. He smiled at her, forcing a smile to appear on her face as well. After pulling herself into a comfortable position, she layed her head down on her pillow, closing her eyes. Figuring it was his cue, he stood up, making his way out of the room.

"Aiden?"

"Yes baby," He asked, turning back around and heading toward her bedside once more.

"I'm sorry."

"For what?"

". . .For everything. I have been so absent, and I just. . .I just am sorry for everything I put you through, you don't deserve it. I wish I could be good to you, Aiden, I wish I could show you as much commitment as you show me everyday, and I am sorry that I'm not. . ."

He smiled, choking back as he sat down next to her, "Mere. . .Mere, you have just, you have given me so much, and you don't have to say your sorry baby, I understand. I'm not trying to be everything you need, I am just trying to be there for you. Hell, I'd love to be your night and day like you are to me, but I'm not going to force anything on you because I know that you have been though so much, and I love you. I know that we have only been together for a year, and I know that this is going to be hard, but you know what? I am willing to take every chance with you Mere. So here it is, here is my chance I'm taking: I love you with all my heart, and I never want to let you go Meredith Grey, so would you do me the honor of becoming Mrs. Meredith Schaffer?"

_I am no solution  
To this sound of dispollution in me  
yah  
And I was not the answer so forget you if ever thought it was me  
yah_

"Everything I do. . .Everything is just so wrong!"

"Derek, geez! I don't think I have ever seen you this upset!" Izzie commented as he paced back and forth in front of her.

"Izzie, what do you expect???? I have. . .I AM JUST SUCH AN ASS!"

Laughing, Izzie began, "That would be the understtement of the year! You would have been looooong gone if I were Meredith."

"Your not helping!" Derek practically yelled at her.

"You know what?" She said, scrunching her nose up as she finished her knitting, "Your so cute when your mad!"

"Izzie!"

"Fine! Ok, ummm, tell her your sorry."

"Don't you think that I have already tried that?"

"I donno, your a pretty dumb guy, Derek."

"I know, I know," He threw his hands into his unruly hair.

"The first step i salways admitting it."

"Then what is step two, what do I do next?" He asked desperatly.

Izzie dropped her knitting into her lap, looking directly at him, clearly annoyed, "Derek, I'm not your matchmaker. You need to figure these things out on your own! You and Meredith had something, ok? Rekindle it, find the passion again. Make her realize that she still loves you!"

"So what do I do?"

"Derek. Seriously? I don't know her! You are the one who is in love, you know everything about her! Figure something out!"

". . .Right. . ."

_And I don't need a fall out  
Of all the past that's here between us  
And I'm not holding on  
And all your lies weren't enough to keep me here_

Lying in his bed, Derek wondered what exactly he could do for Meredith to make her realize that she loved him, to make her remember all of those times that they had together on stormy nights, to reminisce on every date and dinner they went to, to recall every time that they made love. His voice was heavy, the only thing audibly in his room. The lights were out as he tied to concentrate. Was this even possible? Was Meredith already too far gone? No. She wasn't out of his reach just yet; not until she said 'I do' to another man at the alter, then it would be lost hope, but not now. Now he could make it up, he could show her his love. Everything had suddenly become so simple to Derek as he formulated a plan to get his love back.

_I know it's out there  
I know it's out there  
I can fear you falling  
I know it's out there  
I know it's out there  
Somehow here is gone  
I know it's out there  
I know it's out there  
Somehow here is gone_


	31. City Lights, 31

Noticing that he couldn't go wrong with his idea, Derek jumped out of his bed that he was staying in at Izzie's, picked up an old radio and some batteries, speeding out the door. He jumped into his car; he knew exactly what Meredith wanted: and that was him. All he needed to do was give her what she always wanted from him and they could live happily together again. He pulled in the driveway, only seeing Meredith's car in the driveway which made him even more ecstatic. He still would have done it, even with Aiden there, but he just felt more comfortable if it was just the two of them. Shivers ran down his body; he held a large toothy grin on his face, thinking that he knew exactly what he needed to do for his Meredith. Standing under her window, he placed the radio down, turning it on to play a familiar karaoke tune as he began to sing at the top of his lungs,

"I want you to want me!  
I need you to need me!"

By this time Meredith had ran to her window to see what all the commotion was. Looking down, she saw Derek standing directly below her; he was singing her absolute favorite song at the top of his lungs. . .to the world.

"Id love you to love me!  
Im beggin you to beg me!  
Ill shine up the old brown shoes, put on a brand-new shirt!  
Ill get home early from work if you say that you love me!!"

She had escaped from her window, rushing downstairs. As she opened the door, she came almost face to face with him as he kept singing

"Didn't I, didn't I, didn't I see you cryin?" He still sang to her; her face seemed full of sorrow rather than cheer. Fearing that his plan wasn't going exactly as he planned, he tried a little bit louder to emphasize his point.

"Oh, didn't I, didnt I, didn't I see you cryin?  
Feelin' all alone without a friend, you know you feel like-"

"Derek stop!" She scolded, stopping him instantly. "Why do you do this to me? Why do you torture me?"

He smiled, looking at her straight in her eyes, "Because. . .Because," he now raised his voice to a scream, as though shouting to the world rather than her, "I love you Meredith Grey!!!" She stopped instantly, taking a deep breath as she tried to hold back her tears; it was the first time 'I love you' actually came out of his mouth rather than 'ditto', or 'me too.' " Meredith, I love you, in a really, really big pretend to like your taste in music, let you eat the last piece of cheesecake, hold a radio over my head outside your window, unfortunate way that makes me hate you, love you." He said laughing as tears brimmed his eyes as well as hers, "So pick me, choose me, love me."

"Derek," Was all she could force out. Even though tears brimmed her lids, he could tell that it wasn't for the same reason that his tears would spill over any minute. His smile suddenly dropped; all hope was gone. Shaking his head lightly, he muttered the words "No, no, no," under his breath, he knew what was going to come next as he looked down at her hand. "Derek. . .Derek, I'm engaged."

"Oh. . .No, no, Mer, no. . ." He said as his head shook, his breathing quickly increasing.

"I'm sorry Derek," She said, letting a few tears slip down her red face, "I am so sorry." Taking a few steps back slowly, she watched him as she backed into her house. The last thing she saw was Derek's mouth hanging open, standing there slouched in the middle of her lawn before she turned off the light and ran to her room where she cried all night.


	32. City Lights, 32

**It's been awhile!! So sorries, I have been up at school, studying for my SATs and all that other kind of crap that comes with High School   
I want to thank you all for reading this story!! Really, you don't know how much it means to me. I must say right now, that I started with writing this fic on a forum, so there may be some mistakes, and I'm sorry for it. Everything likes to fall into place, how do I say this… awkwardly maybe when you are writing on a forum. Sorry again!!  
So, as we all know, the beautiful Grey's Anatomy characters all belong to Shonda, even though I wish I could own Derek…..well, ahem anyways, Aiden came from me, and is mine-rs. Thanks for reading!!**

"You were crying all night," He said nonchalantly as he sipped his coffee, the newspaper in front of his face when she entered. Meredith looked completely disheveled; her hair was a mess, makeup dripped carelessly down her lifeless face, wearing only one sock.

"Was I?" she asked, barely caring that he noticed. She made her way, slowly but surely to the coffee pot. Setting the paper down on the table, he noticed that she was just barely dragging her feet across the floor, slouching; this was not his Meredith.

"I wasn't going to ask why, but you seem so upset. And, I think I deserve to know why my beautiful fiancé is so upset." He asked, concerned, as he made his way to her, placing his large hand on her back, rubbing it gently, "What's the matter, Mer?" After a short time of no response, he shook his head knowingly, "Don't let him get to you babe. Just don't, look what he does to you!"

"I have to go get ready," She said after taking a deep breath, "I don't want to be late for work," she added, heaving herself up the stairs with a cup of coffee in hand.

Days had passed by, followed by weeks and then months, but Derek never left Seattle Grace. Meredith tried so hard to get over what happened that night so long ago, but it seemed impossible. Derek had actually told her he loved her; that was big for her. In the eight years that they had been together, so happy, so giddy and ecstatic with each other, he had never once said it. But now, now he had, after she left him, after she was 'happy', after she was engaged. But things were different now between the three of them; they had become friendlier, almost like a family. Derek was still head over heals for him Meredith, but he wanted her to be happy, so he backed off for a little while. He got to know Aiden during his time at Seattle Grace, and found him suitable for Meredith. She was ecstatic that she could always be with Aiden and Derek without fear of doing something stupid that she would regret. She never admitted it, but sometimes at night while she was in bed with Aiden, she would imagine what life would be like if she had chosen Derek rather than Aiden, or what it would have been like if she never left, and if he had never cheated on her. Derek had moved into the house temporarily until the wedding which wasn't yet set. Meredith had to continually have her ring on, and play with it constantly to remind herself as well as Derek that they would never be together again.  
"Derek!" Meredith yelled as she ran down the stairs to the kitchen. A panicked look overtook her as she entered the kitchen.

"What?" He asked, scared as he turned around to meet her. Her eyes were scanning every inch of the kitchen, observing the magnificent changes.

"Wha- wha- what is this???" She said, picking up snowflake doilies that were hanging off of the counter, "And all this, what is this about??" She asked, tearing down a set of lights.

"Hey hey hey!!!" He quickly rushed over, taking them out of her hands, "It's Christmas! Get in the spirit Merbear!! These took me forever to get up." He said as he stood onto a chair to replace the lights.

"And it will take me a matter of seconds to get them all down." She stormed into the other room.

"No no no!!" He jumped off of the chair, snatching her up before she could reach any of his decorations.

"Derek!" She yelled, struggling to get out of his grasp, "Derek, put me down this instant!"

"Hey, what's the commotion?" Aiden asked as he came down the stairs, straightening his collar.

"Derek put up decorations, _decorations_ Aiden!" She sqealed

"I like them." He said, looking down at his shirt, buttoning it to the top.

"Ha! See?" Derek bragged, letter her out of his arms.

"Aiden!"

"Oh, don't worry baby," He said, walking over to Meredith and placing a kiss on her head, sending a cold shutter down Derek's spine, "It will only be for like, a month," he looked up at Derek, "Maybe two," he asked, shrugging his shoulder.

"Two months??? I think not, more like two weeks, max."

"Oh you are such a scrooge Mer!" He said, smiling at her.

"Yes, that's me. I am scrooge. Now take it down!"

"In two months," he smiled, placing a kiss on her head once Aiden left into the kitchen.

Letting out an angry sigh, she also trudged into the kitchen, Derek close behind. Whipping open the refrigerator door, she turned on her heels to face Derek once more, "Fudge? You made Fudge?"

"Very good fudge, you should try it," He said, winking as he took out a bowl and his box of Muesli.

"You guys fight way too much," Aiden smiled, shaking his head as he took a sip of coffee.

"And Meredith screams way too loud," Derek said under his breath when his cup met his lips.

"I heard that." she said, shooting him a death glare.

"And I hear you. . .like twice a week, you know how hard it is to get some decent sleep around here?"

She scoffed at him, and then smiled, "You want us to make a calendar for you, then you can get a motel the nights we decide to fuck." Glaring at her, he shook his head, returning to his coffee. "I win," she stated.

"Really, you guys, this needs to stop." Aiden interrupted, "Ever since he has moved in, all you two do is bicker and fight," he laughed, kissing Meredith on the lips quickly before heading back out of the room, "Now come on, we are going to be late for work."

"Shotgun!" They called simultaneously, rushing out of the door.


End file.
